Quote:
Originally Posted by Less
Yes, I agree, the problem that arises is finding others with a similar pattern in time to make my winter overcoat.
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Was in Savile Row earlier today and whilst being dressed to the left, had occasion to mention this discourse.
The tailor lackey fellow became apopleptic, and said 'surely sir did not speak to this vagabond face to face?' I allowed the reddening, shortness of breath and seizures to continue for a few minutes before stating firmly 'of course not you imbecile, its the internet and I use antiseptic wipes between keypresses'. I kicked him and called the ambulance.
Two hours later, the ambulance arrived (the lord God David Icke bless our tory government for its munificence). And as said tailor lackey was being wheeled into the delapidated, bald tyred, rusting vehicle, attended by a 45 year old apprentice doing a level 1 NVQ in 'lifesaving techniques in socialist media' whilst being paid £2.40 an hour, he turned to me and croaked 'tell the unwashed one to google patchwork'
I have no idea what the blazes goggles have to do with this but I'm simply passing information down the foodchain to you amoebae.
Later that day whilst dining on mince and slices of quince, using the required runcible spoon, I spoke to my cook, the venerable Mrs Hyndburnbridges. She is a font of knowledge on the lower class unemployed, having gutted and cooked many of these for my father before he shook off his mortal coil, owing to a conflagration with my index finger and a gloch machine pistol.
I digress, Mrs Hyndburnbridges flat out refused to tell me her deep fried cat kebab recipe but did say that skins boiled in 'quink' ink will remain 'azure blue' for 120 washes. and so I trust this will negate the need for you to be so picky over what kind of pussy you skin and eat!