[Margaret Pilkington]

Both of those situations are equally bad.
My thoughts go out to those older folk who have family, but are left on their own.
My mum is 88 and I beg and plead with her to spend the day with us, but she won't.
So we take a Christmas feast to her.
She prefers to spend her day quietly.....and once we have delivered her (hot) meal we are 'dismissed'.

I know that these days there are a few logistical reasons why she won't come to us.She can't get upstairs in our house, and we have no downstairs lavvy.
I told her that himself would give her a piggy back to the lav.
This caused much hilarity......and she said that he might not get her there in time.