[Div3North]

Barnet FC

V

Accrington Stanley

2017/18 Prediction League; Game 34 v Barnet (away)

I have some good news and some bad news ……………….. actually, I have two lots of good news and some bad news………………

Good News; (1) we’re playing the team bottom of the League and (2) if we win – since Luton v Coventry is postponed through a fixture clash (Coventry still in the FA Cup, or some such rubbish) – we’ll still be second, but within 3 points (and some goals) of Luton with the same number of games played, and the same number of wins

Bad News; although Barnet have only six League wins all season (with only Chesterfield and Morecambe anywhere near them on 7, and everyone else on at least 9) – and accepting that three of those six were against Morecambe (2-1) and Cambridge (3-1) at home, and a sliding Newport side (2-1) away, the other three were against Luton (1-0), Notts County (1-0) and Swindon (4-1 away) ……………… so they can, on their day, beat the good stuff as well as the mediocre ……………. Bear it in mind, Lads; no such thing as a free lunch ……………..

AND the Wycombe PocketPickers did it again last night, you no doubt saw, beating Swindon 3-2 with an 89th-minute goal from You Fat Bastard (although didn’t he take it well?)……….. Colchester (unbeaten in five) increased Coventry’s woes with a third successive defeat (2-1), Mansfield Did It Right Royally unto Newport (hence “sliding” above) with a 5-0 thumping; Cambridge stamped on Chesterfield’s fingers with a 95th-minute winner (what is it about the 93rd, 95th and 98th minutes of games – I’ll swear there are more goals at those three moments than any other - except, perhaps, 45+2 – see Lincoln’s 1-0 win over Cheltenham last night which snook (snooked? snookend?) them back into 7th); and Vegan Greenpeace got their fourth consecutive home win, tupping Stevenage 3-1

Two weeks into the season Barnet were 4th; P2 W1 D1; after 6 weeks they were 7th – P6 W3 D1 L2 …………… since then they’ve won 3, drawn 6, and lost 17, including losing five on the bounce, four out of five, and five out of six at various stages ……….. away, their record is W2 D3 L1 GF17 GA31; at home, it’s W4 D4 L7 GF13 GA17 for an overall P32 W6 D7 L19 GF30 GA48 and 25 points – two behind Chesterfield and five behind Crewe (who have a worse GD, even if it is only -1 worse!) …………they came to our place on 28th October and we whopped them 4-1, goals from Sean McPlayerOfTheSeason, Jordan Clark, William Rodney Whizz, and Special K Jackson …………. Last season we lost 2-0 at theirs but beat them 1-0 at ours (goal by Shay McBratfud, referee Mark Heywood, who also ref’d when we won 4-1 against them this season which makes him sound like our Lucky Ref!) After us they host Carlisle, visit Colchester, and take on Portly Vale at the Hive ………….. Hmmm

Limited investment in the Transfer Window; they sold Jamal Campbell-Ryce (he’s got a distant cousin called Campbell-Soup, I think) to Carlisle for “£nominal” (which is a new one on me!), and ProperSigned MFs Fuad Sule (from Nigeria via Bohemians) on 1st January and Jordan Nicholson from the Posh on 31st January, both for “£undisclosed”, which I suspect is more than “£nominal”, though not necessarily a lot more ………… deadline day loans in comprised neverheardofhim GK George Legg from Reading and 20-year old Austrian defender Tin Plavotic (you could have some fun with that name, n’est-ce pas?) from Bristol Citties ………….. and, of course, they’re on their third Manager this season ……………… mind you, “Third Time Lucky” might not apply if it’s that nice Mr Westlife (which it is)

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 3.00pm on Saturday 17th February (soon be Easter!) ………………. With eight wins out of the last nine played, 61 points, 19 wins in 32, the joint second-best GD behind Luton, and with a goal differential over Barnet of +37 (ie our GD is +19, theirs is -18, we having scored 56 to their 30), I’d expect that the Bookies would have us as slight favourites for this one ……………. But just remember what happens when you get Cocky (unless it’s that soup – Cocky Leaky); you get bitten on the bum!

All told, in 38 League and Cup games they’ve scored 40 (and conceded 59); leading scorers are Shaquille Coulthirst with 8 in the League and 10 in all competitions, Simeon Akinola with 4 (+1), and the now-departed MF Jamal Campbell-Ryce, ex Ebbsfleet forward John Akinde and Portuguese MF Mauro Vilhete, each with 4 ……… with a defence playing well, and better firepower than Lord Nelson had

• “We’ve three guns aft and another one fore,
And they’ve promised us a funnel for the next World War”

.... this is really a “should/must win” – as are the remaining games up to and including May!

And finally, your starter for ten; who wrote the lyrics above, and what play/film are they from?

Good luck to everyone! ......... Keep the Faith! .......... And thanks for playing!