[Div3North]

Accrington Stanley

V

RochDoodles AFC

2018/19 Prediction League; Game 38 v Rochdale (home)

UPDATE

And Lo; it came to pass that it didn’t come to pass – at least, not this weekend .................... Bradford succumbed 1-0 at home to Donnie to stay last; Rochdoodle led Slumberland 1-0 at half time, and were on for a decent point until the 89th minute, when Substitute George Honeyman (that’s not his first name, by the way, that was his playing position) “fired a late winner” to break their hearts and cheer us up no end ................ Sarfend snuck a Desmond at Fleetwood; The Ironing snuck a half-Desmond at the Shrews; Wycombe lost at home to Pompey by the odd goal in five, having been down 2-0 and 3-1; and Walsall lost 3-1 at home to Oxfud, who had players sent off on 45+8 and 90+7 – the latter (Ahmed Kashi, but no relation) - having earlier been booked and then subbed - being given a second yellow for running onto the pitch to celebrate their third goal (scored in the 90+5th minute) ................... Elsewhere, Lincoln now lead League Two by 11 points with five to play, and are one win off automatic; Yeovil avoided dropping into the bottom two by scoring a 91st minute equaliser at Swindon, courtesy of Adel Gafaiti’s header (which would have made them 23rd and Notts County 22nd), but Macclesfield still have a game in hand; SalfordMoneyBags now lead the Bananarama by a point from Clapham Orient and Solihull Moors (and there are NO MOORS IN SOLIHULL!), but Clapton’sOrient have a game in hand (which they play on Tuesday, home to Eastleigh – the Spitfires – who were shot down (get it? Spitfires? Shot down? ............oh suit yourselves!) 4-2 by Fylde on Saturday ........... And Torquay are stitching up the Bananarama South very nicely, and Aldershot are about to slid down the Greasy Pole of Non-League Oblivion ..........

Immediately following Walsall’s latest fiasco they booted their manager Dean Keates into the long grass; his epitaph read

“Walsall Football Club have (sic) tonight parted company with manager Dean Keates with immediate effect. The club would like to place on record its thanks to Dean for all his hard work and dedication during his time with the Saddlers and wish him well for the future."

And shut the door as you leave!

To be fair, after seven games they were 5th with 15 points – four wins and three draws – and then they were stuffed 4-1 at home by Donnie, and it’s been pretty much downhill ever since (they’re third-bottom, and have lost their last five on the bounce)

Top of the Incontinence League – sorry (bloody auto-correction!) Incompetence League - are Walsall (no points in five – although they were Pompey at home (2-3), Slumberland (away, 1-2), the LambChops (home, 0-1), Donnie (away, 1-3) and Oxfud (home, 1-3) – and Bratfud, who’ve also lost their last five straight ............... next in order of Awfulness come Sarfend and Wycombe, each with one point from their last possible 15 ..... Form sides are Oxfud and Charlton (did you see Lee Bowyer wants the QPR job now that Dutchie McClaren's been rubbed out – talk about biting the Hand that Feeds), each with 13/15

Talking about the “where will we get enough points to stay up?" – a conversation being had in an unusually large number of places this season – it sort of looks like this ...................

24th; Bradford play Brizzle (away), Coventry (away), Gillingham (home), Scunthorpe (away) and finish up with a visit from the Wombles

23rd; The Rochdoodles have us (away), Pompey (away), Wycombe (home), Brizzle (away), Sarfend (home) and Charlton (away)

22nd; The Saddlers (“My Kingdom for a Horse!”) visit us, then have Sarfend (home), Wycombe (away), the Posh (home) and end up at Shrewsbury

21st; The Wombles are at Oxfud, then host Brizzle, then go to Luton Louts, then receive Wycombe, and end up at Bratfud

20th; Southend play Wycombe (home), Walsall (away), Burton (home), Rochdoodles (away) and end up with Slumberland coming to play out

19th; Wycombe play Charlton at home on Tuesday, then go to Sarfend and Rochdale, then host Walsall and visit the Wombles before ending their season with a visit from the Codpieces

18th; The Iron get Burton at home, Blackpool at home, Charlton (away), Bratfud at home and end up at Plymouth (Hoe Hoe Hoe!)

We have the Doodles, Walsall, Luton, Donnie (away), Plymouth, and a trip to ChimersVille

We might have another look at “Who’s Got Who” after Saturday ........... but if it all goes TU, we might not ......................

Brian Barry Stuart-Hargreaves, lately of “Hi-De-Hi” but now Manager of the Doodles started his full time Managerial career with a Life Lesson that the Voodoo Gods of Football Don’t Play Nice ........... an 89th minute sickener(see above) He’ll be very well aware that Rochdale, Southend, Walsall and Scunthorpe have all sacked their managers in the last five weeks – and some big reputations were flushed down the pan in doing so; and it Isn’t A Nice Feeling, I imagine .............. one part elation to nine parts fear – and just remember what They did to Edward II! So keep your friends close, and your enemies closer – but watch out for Butts of Malmsey and Red Hot Pokers (and I don’t mean the flowers!)

You are, of course, welcome to keep your earlier prediction (assuming you made one), or to change it any time up to scheduled kick-off, which is 7.45pm on Tuesday 9th April ..................and here’s hoping that by this time next week we’ve got enough points that we can stop worrying, and start laughing at the fate of others ..........................Mwahahahahahah!

Good luck to everyone! ................ Keep the Faith! ............... And thanks for playing!