seeing my absent dad through adult eyes
Posted 16-12-2005 at 00:31 by harwood red
A couple of months ago I blogged about the break up of my parents marriage and the aftermath that followed....
Well it is about 23 years ago since that happened and I have only ever seen my dad once since that day when I gave him back the xmas money in his shop..
I know my dad moved away from harrogate sometime after that incident but not sure how long after and the only time I ever heard anything about him was when we went to see my Aunt Mary.
She was a lifetime friend of the family but I grew up calling her Aunty. I loved visiting Aunty Mary as she lived in a massive cottage (which is unusual) in the middle of nowhere...literally, as her house sat right inbetween 2 signs. one saying you were entering one town and the same with the other. So even to this day I couldn't actually tell you where she lived.
It was from Aunt Mary that I learnt my dad was to be a father again but this time naturally (if you remember myself and my brother were adopted) and it felt like a stab in the heart when I heard... Even more so when I learnt this child was due near my birthday... They had a boy, missing my birthday by a couple of weeks...phew. He will be about 21 ish now and I have never met him, although I used to hear stories that he became a really spoilt brat!!! It would be nice I think one day if we did meet but I will probably leave that for fate to decide.
After I got married and had my first child and was quickly pregnant with my second my then husband decided it might be a good idea if we could get away for a couple of nights whilst my mum took care of the little one... I'd heard my dad was living in whitby by this time and again had a newsagents/book shop, so we took the caravan, dropped Ben off at my mums in Harrogate and set off to a little caravan site just outside of whitby. I remember it so clearly as the wind was howling and I thought the caravan was going to be blown away it was rocking that much!!!
After a night of not much sleep due to hanging on for dear life, we set off into whitby, had a lovely day trundling round doing the touristy bits and then we went on the search for the shop...
Shop found.... what do I do now??? more to follow...
Well it is about 23 years ago since that happened and I have only ever seen my dad once since that day when I gave him back the xmas money in his shop..
I know my dad moved away from harrogate sometime after that incident but not sure how long after and the only time I ever heard anything about him was when we went to see my Aunt Mary.
She was a lifetime friend of the family but I grew up calling her Aunty. I loved visiting Aunty Mary as she lived in a massive cottage (which is unusual) in the middle of nowhere...literally, as her house sat right inbetween 2 signs. one saying you were entering one town and the same with the other. So even to this day I couldn't actually tell you where she lived.
It was from Aunt Mary that I learnt my dad was to be a father again but this time naturally (if you remember myself and my brother were adopted) and it felt like a stab in the heart when I heard... Even more so when I learnt this child was due near my birthday... They had a boy, missing my birthday by a couple of weeks...phew. He will be about 21 ish now and I have never met him, although I used to hear stories that he became a really spoilt brat!!! It would be nice I think one day if we did meet but I will probably leave that for fate to decide.
After I got married and had my first child and was quickly pregnant with my second my then husband decided it might be a good idea if we could get away for a couple of nights whilst my mum took care of the little one... I'd heard my dad was living in whitby by this time and again had a newsagents/book shop, so we took the caravan, dropped Ben off at my mums in Harrogate and set off to a little caravan site just outside of whitby. I remember it so clearly as the wind was howling and I thought the caravan was going to be blown away it was rocking that much!!!
After a night of not much sleep due to hanging on for dear life, we set off into whitby, had a lovely day trundling round doing the touristy bits and then we went on the search for the shop...
Shop found.... what do I do now??? more to follow...
Total Comments 2
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Re: seeing my absent dad through adult eyesOoooh another cliffhanger, I love em, can't wait to read the rest.
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Posted 16-12-2005 at 08:07 by lettie
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Re: seeing my absent dad through adult eyesI've told you what I feel about your Dad. You don't, or shouldn't just stop loving/seeing a child just because a marriage breaks down, and that's regardless of how they came to be parents, addoption or not. Children are a gift, even if sometimes you do want to take them back to the shop when they are being little monsters.
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Posted 16-12-2005 at 11:51 by garinda
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