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Home James, and Don't spare the horses...

Posted 01-01-2009 at 15:35 by Rick

G’Day, mates! ITMA!

I enjoy driving. I enjoy driving a lot, maybe because I don’t get to do much due to the fact I am always on a ship, but when I am home, I love to drive! I drive fast on the motorway, (69 miles an hour officer, honestly) I have a comfortable car and I spend quite a bit of time in it when I am at home. More gadgets and gizmos than you can shake a stick at. Sat Nav, DVD player, blue tooth attachment for my phone you name it, it is in there. The car itself has been electronically limited to around 170 miles an hour and has a Low jack system fitted. “What has all this to do with your day in the Bahamas,” I can almost hear you cry, as with one voice! “Are you trying to sell us your car?” No, gentile reader, I am not trying to sell my car, but I just want to convey how much I enjoy driving! A lot. So when I got the opportunity to take part in the Bahamas Jeep Safari, I jumped at the chance!

This may not be for the faint of heart, but it is a real blast! First of all, as the Bahamas was once under British rule, ( Rule Britania, Britiana rules the waves!) all the driving is done on the Left, in jeeps with left hand drives. It makes overtaking very interesting, especially as a lot of the drivers from the US cannot seem to get their head around driving on the correct side of the road. There is nothing quite so terrifying as seeing a car heading right for you , while the driver of the other vehicle is convinced it is you that is the wrong! It makes life…interesting! You do need to be over 25 if you are driving, and because of my youthful demeanor, they did need to see my license! Once the uncontrollable laughter at my photo had subsided, (to be fair, the photo is from my days as a magician, complete with pony tail and moustache!) I was taken to my Jeep, and introduced to my victims, sorry passengers! One of them I recognized from my kayak tour the other day. Apparently, her arms were still feeling a bit sore. For some reason I can’t fathom, our Kayak was harder to maneuver than any of the others. I don’t know what she was on about I’m afraid. I was asleep in the back of our shared Kayak for most of the way back!
I opted for the Stick shift rather than the Automatic, which for some reason filled my passengers with some kind of apprehension, but I quickly assured them by telling them I always drive a stick, but I thought it best not to mention that the stick is usually on my left instead of my right!

We set off in convoy and we soon recognize Taino beach, a name that you will remember from an earlier Blog, and then leaping from the water at Sanctuary Bay, the dolphins come into view. I tried to see my dolphin friend, also from an earlier Blog, but I couldn’t tell which was which. Do you know, I haven’t had a call, an email or even a letter from that Dolphin! Nothing. Talk about Kiss and Run. Huh!

We had a break, and our guide, Randolph, had a chat with us about some local history and the story about Freeport’s founder, Jebidiah Springfield. Sorry, sorry I got confused he was called Wallace Groves, and he had a very interesting life.

Then came the off road bit. “Hold on tight!” I thought to my self, though in retrospect, maybe I should have given voice to my thoughts, as the convoy hurtled through the forest on its way to Gold Rock beach. Once there, I changed into my swim shorts and enjoyed lunch, as well as a well-deserved Capri Sun. I was very thirsty. I stood tall, knowing as I removed my Ray-Bans, that my driving skills were indeed a topic of conversation. I as walked past the group, slowly of course so they could all admire my manly physique, (Adele says I have TWICE the body of Brad Pitt! Hang on a minute; I have just realized she is calling me Fat!) On my way back, I had different passengers. I smiled at them all and asked why I had the pleasure of their company on the way back. “We drew straws,” one of them said. “And you won?” I asked. “No” came the firm, unsmiling, reply. “No, we didn’t”

Ah well, never mind. Time to go back. “Atomic batteries to power. Turbo’s to speed…Roger, ready to move out! Ye-hah!”

‘Till next time
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