Who's shaped you?

[lindsay ormerod]

I had a wonderful English teacher at Moorhead called John Bolton who inspired and had belief in me. 2 other teachers at Moorhead, Bill Green and Tony Robinson taught me that to be a girl and still like cricket was in fact not a hanging offence (bearing in mind this is going back some 30+years !) and they stood up for me wanting to go on cricket trips that prior to that had been "boys only". I have had the pleasure to work with some brilliant area/regional managers and some who were frankly bloody awful, amongst the best was Lorcan Devine, my area manager at Our Price , who having been sideways shuffled finally got back to our patch and discovered I had been demoted by a complete goon who classed me as a "narrow minded heavy metal fan", Lorcan's first job back was to reinstate me! I have heard he has sadly died last year, he would have been in his late 40's.
During the end of "Our Price" our Area manager was a chap called Stephen Widdowson, and he never, never gave up, fought every step of the way and his commitment to the cause, albeit a lost one was awesome.
Finally my amazing Dad,Alick Ormerod, retired English Lit lecturer, raconteur,author, cricket obsessive, columnist to the Observer and father to the finest amateur bowler the Lancs League has ever seen, the guy is a legend. And my mum, hard working, honest, generous to a fault, forgiving and the best friend I have ever had. I think that's it.

[Margaret Pilkington]

Bernie, I am glad that you found someone who could lift you and make you whole.......I feel that men who abuse women(either mentally or physically....and both are as bad as each other) are lacking in self esteem. They feel, that to make themselves big they have to diminish another human being.....they cannot see that by doing this they actually diminish themselves.

[Benipete]

Originally Posted by MargaretR

So self reliance is not your scene.
Don't be sad for me - it feels good to me.

I feel sad for an empty glass because I don't know what to put in it,but I feel even sadder for a glass that is full.

I'm not a full glass there is room for me to learn and improve(or not).

By the way I was brought up in care till I was 16, met my wife when I was 17,Bought my first house and got married when I was 19.I think I could write the book on self reliance.Indeed I have been asked on many occasions to write my story.But It's nearly as sad as your quote.

[garinda]

Originally Posted by BERNADETTE

As has been said all of the people we encounter in life are part of what shapes us. Through living through experiences we then learn and adapt our lives accordingly. Ian was a very positive influence in my life, when I met him I had just come out of what I now see was an abusive marriage. Abuse doesn't have to be physical (although it was on a couple of occassions) but IMO mental abuse can be just as bad. Ian built my confidence and made me see I was not the fat, ugly person my ex made me believe I was. He helped to make me the confident person I am and for that I am eternally grateful. Yes people will say I should have been able to see it for myself but when you are constantly told something negative about yourself eventually you begin to believe it

He drove me mad, and I him.

We differed on many things, and nearly always had to agree to disagree, but that was in threads. Behind the scene we exchanged numerous pm's in which we shared many hilarious jokes.

It was a real treat to meet my old foe/pal the two times that I did.

Bernie you know as well as I do that he'd hate people talking sentimentally about him...but tough!

You were a good man, who made a difference, and it's not just your darling, much loved wife that misses you...there are lots of us that do. So just sit back up there and listen for a change.

(Told you I'd get the last word!)

[mattylad]

I can answer this one easily.

Dilbert!

[shakermaker]

Early signs show that each of my immediate family have had the biggest effect, for which I'm grateful. It's difficult to reflect while still in the fog of youthful idiocy. I'll come back to this thread in twenty years; I'm still being moulded, battered and eroded at the minute.

[Margaret Pilkington]

Originally Posted by shakermaker

Early signs show that each of my immediate family have had the biggest effect, for which I'm grateful. It's difficult to reflect while still in the fog of youthful idiocy. I'll come back to this thread in twenty years; I'm still being moulded, battered and eroded at the minute.

All of us are.
We will not be finished until we take our last breath.....and then those who did the most recent work will stand up and eulogise us.....we hope.

[garinda]

Originally Posted by shakermaker

Early signs show that each of my immediate family have had the biggest effect, for which I'm grateful. It's difficult to reflect while still in the fog of youthful idiocy. I'll come back to this thread in twenty years; I'm still being moulded, battered and eroded at the minute.

What Marg P. said is true.

The moulding's an ongoing process, until it's time for the mould to be broken.

[DaveinGermany]

Rindy, my Friend it appears you have caused quite a ripple on the waters of life with this very inquiring question ! On the face of it something easy & straightforward, but then again by the responses a very introspective choice has to be made by those who subscribe. Well done, you've encouraged folk to look to their lives & for a short while at least focus on what is truly relevant.

[garinda]

Originally Posted by DaveinGermany

Rindy, my Friend it appears you have caused quite a ripple on the waters of life with this very inquiring question ! On the face of it something easy & straightforward, but then again by the responses a very introspective choice has to be made by those who subscribe. Well done, you've encouraged folk to look to their lives & for a short while at least focus on what is truly relevant.

I'm just interested (nosey) in what make's people tick, and why we are like we are.

I'm definitely in the nurture, rather than nature camp. I truly don't think any child is born good, or evil. Our environment shapes us, in my opinion. Though like MargaretR posted we do all have to make choices too, if we are lucky enough to have some say over our destiny, and have the luxury of choice.

I've enjoyed reading all the replies so far.

I enjoyed reading your post, and it helped me understand a little more why we first locked horns on here, until we came to a better understanding.



Besides, it's much more interesting than politics.

(Did I really post that?)

[garinda]

Lindsay's right.

I probably shouldn't have posted people other than your parents.

It can be anyone who you think.

I've posted in my blog the influence my parents had on me.

No rules.

It can be anyone, or anything you want.

[garinda]

Originally Posted by garinda

I had two teachers who really had a big impact on who I am today. One was a teacher I had in my last two years at Moorend Primary School, Chris Ryan, and I've posted before on AW about the positive impact he had in my life.

The really frightening thing is, if I was just one year younger, I'd be writing about how another teacher had influenced me in those last two years at primary school, Peter Britcliffe.

He would have been so proud of me today.



Incidentally, I know because he taught two close relatives of mine, he was a much loved, and good teacher, who probably did shape young people's lives for the better.

(If only he'd stayed teac....oh never mind.)

[Less]

Originally Posted by Benipete

By the way I was brought up in care till I was 16, met my wife when I was 17,Bought my first house and got married when I was 19.I think I could write the book on self reliance.Indeed I have been asked on many occasions to write my story.But It's nearly as sad as your quote.

I've heard some of Peters tales about when he was in care and yes, most of that period for him then was sad. However most of what happened after that show a man that was more than self reliant, He was an excellent husband to Jean, (who is sadly missed) and is a fine father and a very close and loving Grandfather. I'm sure that if his daughter was to come on this thread she would proudly announce that he was one of the main influences that made her what she is now. Go ahead and write that book Pete, with the humour you have always shown it wouldn't end up as sad as at first it might appear.

[blazey]

This is a nice thread. Up until year 8 of high school I was always an extremely attentive student, worked hard and loved learning and then became disillusioned, felt unchallenged and decided that I would focus on music rather than academic study. It was the collective inspiration from my form tutor, the late Fred Bentley and my physics teacher Mr Wickham which kept me thinking about my academic ability.

On the day of my GCSE results I was still intending on leaving the school to go to college and study music when my English teacher Miss Masterson persuaded me very directly to reconsider and go and do A levels.

I knew I would hate them before I even started, and I did. I picked them badly and ended up despising the college, but in my second year and I chose AS Fine Art alongside the subjects I hated. I had a brilliant tutor called Alan Forsyth who, although didn't quite get me attending college every day or convert me into an eventual art graduate at university, he did manage to make me see that there was light at the end of the tunnel I hadn't particularly enjoyed travelling through. He was fun, unconventional and had a particular streak of rebellion about him. He was, and still is, a fascinating gentleman who unfortunately had to leave teaching entirely due to retirement and family commitments. A great loss to art students in the area I'd say.

Whilst at college I lost my friend Adam Riaz and his strength is an inspiration still when I'm feeling like everything is too much. I could only ever hope to be half the person that he was during such straining times.

I find it harder now that I am actually at University. There are a great number of people who bring different things into my life. I'm almost overwhelmed by the levels of positivity that are suddenly now brought upon me after so many years of doubt due to my slightly 'loose-cannon' nature. Slightly might be an understatement... but I have to say that there is a department here that I've talked about before, which supports students from a wide range of backgrounds but most often students from some sort of difficulty that would make pursuing university difficult, and I think they are the biggest inspiration because they so genuinely care about widening opportunities for those students and giving them the most positive taste of university life they most possibly can whilst NEVER plugging Lancaster University itself, and I think that is brilliant. They're equally wonderful employers to me and provide me with top class support, and I think it is a nice reminder to me to see that there are people who DO want to educate and work with people from places like Accrington, Blackburn, Burnley, etc and further afield (as far as London in some cases!) that don't necessarily have the best opportunities in life but like everyone deserve a chance to shine.

So yeah, I think like it has been said that EVERYONE shapes you in some way. I could have taken this question the other way and talked about the negative parts that have shaped me, but in fact I think this is a nice opportunity to give some praise to, not just those that shaped us, but those that actually went out of their way to help make a difference to us specifically and so selflessly.

[accyman]

Originally Posted by garinda

Who's shaped you?

from what i see down accy i would say for a large amount of people mcdonalds, farmfoods,kfc and iceland