Tickets please.

DtheP47 · 08-10-2014, 15:21

Being train related I was going to tag this onto the Toy train thread but decided that one has hit the buffers just now.

Just come over from Preston on the train. A veritable cornucopia for a people watcher.
Little cameo that had me chuckling.

"Tickets please"
Lad in front of me offers up his ticket for inspection.
"Sorry Sir this ticket is for last month"
Lad fumbles in his wallet, " Can't find it, I'll have to pay, child ticket Preston to Blackburn"
"How old are you sir?"
"15"
"Well how come I can see a drivers licence there in your wallet sir?"
"It's my brothers not mine"
Ticket guy picks up licence for scrutiny.
"Well he looks remarkably like you sir are you twins?"
"Yes" replies the doomed numpty.
"Well in that case you being the same age as your brother who has this licence you will have to pay full fare please"

Boom... Boom

Margaret Pilkington · 08-10-2014, 16:24

I don't travel by train much but I like to listen to the conversation of pensioners on the bus.
I have had many a merry chuckle listening to their tales.

Margaret Pilkington · 08-10-2014, 16:26

http://www.accringtonweb.com/forum/b...t-help-it.html

This blog of mine documents one such conversation.

Restless · 08-10-2014, 17:23

I didn't know till recently that it was "law" that you have to buy tickets on station is the services was available. Ha. Silly me thought you could just get on and pay the dude

DtheP47 · 08-10-2014, 17:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by Restless

I didn't know till recently that it was "law" that you have to buy tickets on station is the services was available. Ha. Silly me thought you could just get on and pay the dude

Not sure about that Restless?
Taxi dropped me at Bishopton station this morning, train already in, I zoomed through ticket office and asked the girl could I pay on the train. She said yes.
Ticket guy on train hadn't got to me by the time we got to Glasgaow Central.
Paid at the exit barrier, they are all set up for that.
Similar when I got to Preston only a couple of minutes to get from Platform 4 to #2 hopped on train and paid ticket inspector no hassles.

Restless · 08-10-2014, 19:37

On the hebden bridge station there was a poster that said it was against the law to board a train without tix on a station with facilities

Less · 08-10-2014, 20:16

The converse of the coin, recently I had to go from Accy to Glasgow, single I was driving back.
Purchased two days before online, must get ticket from ticket machine on Accy Station auto machine using the card that bought the ticket online.

Train 7.50 turned up 7.30 (just in case of problems).
accepted.

Input 16 digit number to machine from receipt.

Firmly placed card that had paid, input 4 digit security code. CONFIRMED.

Fumbled about inside slidey uppy downy plastic screen to retrieve ticket.

Ticket retrieved.

Train to Preston, no prob no-one checked ticket.

saw sign for virgin train help desk called in.

What is the number of my reserved seat please.

That sir is on your second ticket.

Second ticket? I only got one.

No sir you got two.

No, no I only got one I assure you.

Well sir in that case your first ticket is invalid without the second it says so here. He pointed to a space that could have contained the seat number and sure enough it did say I needed a second ticket.

Can you sort it for me? my train is due in 5 minutes,
sorry sir not on a weekend, come back Monday.

But I've paid my fare surely I can catch the train?

I can't stop you boarding the train sir, but, (deep intake of breath), if the ticket inspector on the train finds you without the second ticket in a seat not authorised for you, well...

Don't tell him you spoke to me.

I got on the train a carriage that had approx 60/70 seats, number of occupants?

Besides me, three including a dog.

From Preston up to Glasgow, I was offered food and drink from a trolly, lots of smiles but not once was I asked to produce my ticket plus the other ticket I didn't have.

Got off in Glasgow through the barrier (no check for ticket I had, or the one I didn't have).

A Celebratory coke for safe arrival, picked up the car and began the journey home, which went without anyone in the car asking to check my ticket either.

Bob Dobson · 08-10-2014, 20:35

My sister in law recently overheard two blokes in a doctor's surgery. Hearing my name, she listened in and heard one say that Bob Dobson had started talking posh since he went to live in Blackpool. I left Accrington in 1960. None of my associates would say that I talked posh. Sadly, she intervened before hearing more by saying 'You are talking about my brother-in-law" What would they have said if she had not done this ?

DtheP47 · 08-10-2014, 20:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by Less

From Preston up to Glasgow, I was offered food and drink from a trolly, lots of smiles but not once was I asked to produce my ticket plus the other ticket I didn't have.

Got off in Glasgow through the barrier (no check for ticket I had, or the one I didn't have).

A Celebratory coke for safe arrival, picked up the car and began the journey home, which went without anyone in the car asking to check my ticket either.

Must be your aura Less.