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Welcome to Accrington Web! We are a discussion forum dedicated to the towns of Accrington, Oswaldtwistle and the surrounding areas, sometimes referred to as Hyndburn! We are a friendly bunch please feel free to browse or read on for more info. You are currently viewing our site as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, photos, play in the community arcade and use our blog section. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please, join our community today!

Showing results 1 to 19 of 19 Search took 0.00 seconds. Search: Posts Made By: Accyexplorer

Forum: Anything Goes 26-01-2016, 23:43

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day David Cameron dies and goes to heaven.He knocks quietly on the pearly gates and put walks St. Peter. "Oh it's you",says Peter,"I'm sorry no scumbags allowed in heaven". "What?" exclaims...

Forum: Anything Goes 07-01-2016, 16:59

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day Just been banned from B&Q,some guy in a orange apron came upto me an asked if I wanted decking....luckily,I got the first punch in.

Forum: Anything Goes 18-08-2015, 10:37

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day Mrs E and I went into town to grab some bits from peel street chemist.When we came out, there was a copper writing out some kind of warning/ticket. We went up to him and I said, "Come on...

Forum: Anything Goes 27-07-2015, 09:18

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I went to see the doctor the other day and said, 'Doc, I think I'm going senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip my flies up.' 'That's not senility,' replied the doctor. 'Senility is...

Forum: Anything Goes 18-07-2015, 13:13

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I went to see my Doctor last week I told him I have a problem with flatulence,I told him "it really doesn't bother me too much as they never smell and they're always silent". "As a matter of fact"...

Forum: Anything Goes 11-07-2015, 18:48

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day Me and my scouser mate go into Greggs. My mate being a typical scouser nicks 3 pies and puts them in his pocket, then when outside boasts to me, "Did you see that? The staff never even seeb me." I...

Forum: Anything Goes 03-07-2015, 16:37

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I was talking to our pegs nephew on the phone the other day he said "I don't know why folk are getting so worked up about immigration" He said "my neighbours are English,all the kids in the local...

Forum: Anything Goes 20-06-2015, 15:05

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I left the car in the Arndake car park the other day, when I came back to it the bumper and rear lights were all smashed. Then I found this note under the wiper. It said: I accidentally reversed...

Forum: Anything Goes 16-06-2015, 17:13

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day THE TEXT MESSAGE Today I reciecved a text,it's said:- "Hi Jason, This is Bob from next door. I’m sorry about this old chap, but I have a confession to make. I've been trying to pluck up the...

Forum: Anything Goes 13-01-2015, 18:25

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day The teacher called little Johnny to her desk and said, "The essay you wrote about your pet dog is word-for-word the same as your brother's. What do you have to say for yourself?" "Of course it...

Forum: Anything Goes 18-10-2014, 15:16

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog in a front garden,the dog was licking his bits. One guy turns to his mate and says, "Man, I wish I could do that". His mate says,...

Forum: Anything Goes 04-10-2014, 06:56

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day The boss of Dulux paints has died of hypothermia while trekking across the Antarctic. Medics say he could of done with a second coat.

Forum: Anything Goes 10-09-2014, 18:22

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day The Government has warned that if Scotland votes for independence, they may not be allowed to keep the Pound. 44223 I knew there wasn't much money up North D, but heroin and tennants :eek:, I...

Forum: Anything Goes 23-08-2014, 12:55

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day "It's a cracker"....may I draw your attention to post #1929 ;)

Forum: Anything Goes 01-07-2014, 00:12

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I just saw a lovely owd dear doing a tribute to the England team.... .....She got off the bus looking a bit confused, then got back on and went home.

Forum: Anything Goes 09-06-2014, 00:15

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day My mate Sid was recently a victim of ID theft.... He's just called S now.

Forum: Anything Goes 27-05-2014, 19:25

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day It's a ten minute walk from my house to the pub. Strangely, it's a half hour walk from the pub to my house :confused: :D

Forum: Anything Goes 25-04-2014, 18:53

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day I have kleptomania..... ....When it gets bad, I have to take something for it.

Forum: Anything Goes 02-02-2014, 01:14

Replies: 2,284 Sticky: Joke Of The Day Views: 163,837 Posted By Accyexplorer Re: Joke Of The Day A couple were out Xmas shopping,The shopping center was packed and as the wife walked around she was surprised to notice the husband was nowhere to be seen. She was quite upset because they had a...

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