New chemical element discovered

[alan7554]

The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by investigators at a major U.S. research university. The element,tentatively named administratium,has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0,However it does have one neutron,125 assistant neutrons,75 vice neutrons and 111 assistant vice neutrons,which gives it an atomic mass of 312.These 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called morons.

Since it has no electrons,administratium is inert.However it can be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes into contact with.According to the discoverers,a minute amount of administratium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would have normally occurred in less than a second.Administratium has a normal half-life of approxiamatley 3 years,at which time it does not decay,but instead undergoes a reorganization in which assistant neutrons,vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places.Some studies have shown that the atomic mass actually increases after each reorganisation.

Research at other laboratories indicates that administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere.It tends concentrate at certain points such as government agencies,large corporations,and universities.It can be found in the newest,best appointed,and best known maintained buildings.

Scientists point out that administratium is known to be toxic at any level of concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction where it ia allowed to accumulate.attempts are being made to determine how administratium can be controlled to prevent irreversable damage,but results to date are not promising.

[jaysay]

Thank god for that its going to greatly enhance my meager existence no end

[Bernard Dawson]

Adimistratium is a spoof that's been doing the rounds for few years now.