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panther 04-02-2008 12:53

switched at birth
 
Iv been watching corrie on tv and it made me think, what would I do if i found out that my son/daughter were NOT my kid/s and that in fact they had been switched at birth:eek:.........horrified!!! well for one they would still be my kids, but i would also be curious of my biological child, would'nt you?

dont get me wrong i would not love my kids any less but it would certainly want me to know about the other child....!
comments?

mrskitty 04-02-2008 13:12

Re: switched at birth
 
I couldn't imagine how it would feel....but i would definately wana know about the other child,and find out exactly how they got switched.I have read a few stories-must be heart breaking and very strange.
taken from wikipedia-
on December 9, 2006 two newborn girls were switched in the hospital in the Czech town of Trebic. The families hadn't found out until September 2007 when a couple of friends of one of the fathers made fun of him that he is not the biological father of the baby. DNA test proved that the girl was indeed switched. After days of investigation, the other family was found. As of October 11, 2007 the families were in contact and figuring out ways to switch the children back.[10]

So it was because of people taking the mick that they found out-imagine all those that never find out-maybe its better for everyone?I dont know.

firth_dawn 04-02-2008 13:16

Re: switched at birth
 
it would be a horrible situation to be told the child you have brought up and thought of as your child wasnt really your i would still love him/her as my own but i agree with you panther i would be curious of my biological child and i would want to know about the other child.

blazey 04-02-2008 13:18

Re: switched at birth
 
I think I would want to pretend I never knew any different but instinctively I imagine i'd have to find out more about the true biological child.

Curiosity killed the cat though.

flashy 04-02-2008 13:57

Re: switched at birth
 
theres a lot of kids in this world who think they know their real dads and they end up not being their real parent, what difference does it make?

cashman 04-02-2008 14:05

Re: switched at birth
 
think thats a tricky one, if ya dug too hard ya could mess someones life up,big time, can understand the curiosity, but hope very much i would be able to let it be. lifes all about choices.

blazey 04-02-2008 14:44

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by flashytart (Post 526599)
theres a lot of kids in this world who think they know their real dads and they end up not being their real parent, what difference does it make?

Well in respect to the child it hurts them when they've been lied to all their life and normally they do pursue the truth once they know their dad isn't their biological father. So I guess it'd be the same for a mother who realises her child isn't hers by blood and she has one that IS somewhere.

beechy 04-02-2008 14:45

Re: switched at birth
 
is not always the best thing to do by both parties
child or parent to trace your past many unpleasant memories
can be uncovered whilst i agree that a lot a people need a finallity
you should always be gratefull for what youve got
adoption wasnt as painless 58 years ago :egged:

flashy 04-02-2008 15:05

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by blazey (Post 526614)
Well in respect to the child it hurts them when they've been lied to all their life and normally they do pursue the truth once they know their dad isn't their biological father. So I guess it'd be the same for a mother who realises her child isn't hers by blood and she has one that IS somewhere.


so therefore why tell the child that a person is her dad when it isnt?

blazey 04-02-2008 15:21

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by flashytart (Post 526620)
so therefore why tell the child that a person is her dad when it isnt?

To avoid confusion at a young age? To please the new boyfriend/husband who has taken on someone elses child?

There are many possible reasons for doing it. Afterall, it cant be easy explaining to a youngster that they dont have a real daddy for whatever reason.

Thats not the issue though is it, the issue is a mother finding out her child isn't actually hers, and that her child by blood has been brought up by someone else without her realising.

Less 04-02-2008 16:11

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by panther (Post 526576)
Iv been watching corrie on tv and it made me think, what would I do if i found out that my son/daughter were NOT my kid/s :eek:.........

Welcome to the world of doubt that has to be faced by many married men!

:D

steeljack 04-02-2008 17:32

Re: switched at birth
 
in a similar vein , it seems mixed-race children fathered by Black GIs to white British women were shipped off to the US after the end of the war ..
Mixed-race babies 'were sent to the US' - Telegraph
wonder if any of the 'mothers' had/have any regrets ? or just wrote it off as something that happened and is best forgotten about :confused: :confused:

panther 04-02-2008 18:38

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by steeljack (Post 526676)
i
wonder if any of the 'mothers' had/have any regrets ? or just wrote it off as something that happened and is best forgotten about :confused: :confused:

I think any decent mother would surely regret what they have done, any mother that doesnt, doesnt deserve to be called a mum IMO

beechy 04-02-2008 18:55

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by panther (Post 526710)
I think any decent mother would surely regret what they have done, any mother that doesnt, doesnt deserve to be called a mum IMO

you need first to find out why you as a child was given up
and why just when you are about to start work you are wanted back
by your biological mother :confused:

steeljack 04-02-2008 19:00

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by panther (Post 526710)
I think any decent mother would surely regret what they have done, any mother that doesnt, doesnt deserve to be called a mum IMO

I don't think you can 'condem' them outright , think the circumstances and societys attitudes the time necessitated the actions they took , similar events happened after the fall of Saigon at the end of the Vietnam war when thousands of mixed race children (Black and White) were sent to the US for upbringing away from any social stigma .
think it's mentioned in the book "Fall of Berlin" about how nearly every German female over the age of 10 was raped by the advancing Russian army ....how many children born in Germany during 45 and 46 were the result of that ? the only difference they were of similar racial stock and could be raised/blended/assimilated into post war society easier .

emzy 04-02-2008 19:44

Re: switched at birth
 
I dont know how id cope if i found out my child wasnt actually mine, alhough slightly different but they did get my 2 confused and put them in the wrong cots (jack in wesleys and wesley in jacks) had hubby confused for a while, good job I knew which one was which lol

cashman 04-02-2008 22:36

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by panther (Post 526710)
I think any decent mother would surely regret what they have done, any mother that doesnt, doesnt deserve to be called a mum IMO

think thats totally wrong, more so way back, there were many more unfair pressures placed on em once of a day.

Lilly 04-02-2008 22:40

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by cashman (Post 526905)
think thats totally wrong, more so way back, there were many more unfair pressures placed on em once of a day.

I agree. People didn't just hand their babies over for adoption because they couldn't be fagged to look after them. They wanted to keep them more than anything but couldn't. We have no idea what it would be like to be in those circumstances.

blazey 04-02-2008 22:47

Re: switched at birth
 
didn't single mothers get put in asylums at one point for having children out of wedlock?

did the children get put up for adoption then?

WillowTheWhisp 04-02-2008 22:48

Re: switched at birth
 
Yes they did and that was appallingly cruel. Thank goodness that no longer happens. A white couple who had a white child (even though not the husband's) could get away with passing it off as the husband's and no stigma would be attached to that child and the child would probably never know that Dad wasn't Dad - but if the woman had an affair with a black GI she could hardly pretend the resulting child was her husband's if he was white like her.

blazey 04-02-2008 22:52

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by WillowTheWhisp (Post 526911)
Yes they did and that was appallingly cruel. Thank goodness that no longer happens. A white couple who had a white child (even though not the husband's) could get away with passing it off as the husband's and no stigma would be attached to that child and the child would probably never know that Dad wasn't Dad - but if the woman had an affair with a black GI she could hardly pretend the resulting child was her husband's if he was white like her.

What alot of people dont realise is that there are people still in hospital now for silly reasons because of old laws and being lost in the system. Only a few months back there was an old lady who'd been in a mental institute since she was 15 for stealing from a shop, something as simple as a chocolate bar. Her family lost trace of her and when they found her (she was in her 80's by this point) she still recognised them all, and sadly she died a few weeks afterwards. There are so many people like her and it just goes unnoticed. Such a shame.

steeljack 04-02-2008 23:10

Re: switched at birth
 
it seems it was quite common for the British Govt. to ship off unwanted children , according to the attached article over 100,000 youngsters , most in Govt. care were sent overseas to help build the "empire' and this went on until 1969 ,
Orphans of the Empire - Times Online, how many were taken from single mothers I have no idea , but would imagine there were quite a few , lengthy article . but some may find it of interest :( :(

blazey 04-02-2008 23:11

Re: switched at birth
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by steeljack (Post 526925)
it seems it was quite common for the British Govt. to ship off unwanted children , according to the attached article over 100,000 youngsters , most in Govt. care were sent overseas to help build the "empire' and this went on until 1969 ,
Orphans of the Empire - Times Online, how many were taken from single mothers I have no idea , but would imagine there were quite a few , lengthy article . but some may find it of interest :( :(

Would love to read that but I've left my studying til the last minute and I've got work due in tomorrow morning again!


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