Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

I read this morning that Tesco are to introduce a range of sexual appliances for purchase in their numerous stores.Why? I know that this retailer has been one of the main culprits in the destruction of our corner shops and town centres but are they now intending to take out Anne Summers as well? Surely they can leave this sort of thing to the specialised shops, the internet & mail order?

I doubt this product line will make a big difference to their profits, and it may well even backfire. I,for one, visit my supermarket to fill my shopping basket with food; I have no wish to be bombarded by the sight of inflatable dolls hanging above the meat aisle,last-minute vibrators at the checkout counter & hard-core porn mags at the ciggy stall. Tesco, you have lost my trade.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

they have been stocking sex toys for years

cucumbers
bananas
ice cream
squirty cream
yoghurt

fish fingers (hey dont judge me ) :o


i wonder if people will be having tescos partys at home like anne summers do lol

ps;

excellent avatar tealeaf :thumbsup:

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Let's face it T' the idea is that if you are on a low budget and get tempted by these items, You know that this time you have been totally f*cked! Without looking at your Bill.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

i certainly dont envy anyone working on the returns desk

eeeeeeeewww


excuse me madam i would like to return this vibrator as it says one size fits all but all my friends tried it out and it didnt fit tracey so i want my money back :)

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

It sounds like the perfect job for you mate

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I hope this is a joke because I dont want to answer the inevitable questions from my daughter. By the way have they put a minimum legal purchase age on these items. Would it look different in the toileteries and toys departments. ;)

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Chav1: "Excuse me but this inflatable doll I purchased keeps going down on me."
Returns Desk Assistant: "If we had known that sir you would have been charged an extra tenner."

The old ones are the best.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

i like that one yerself pmsl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Can see the next Tesco advert now with the sloggan "Get A Buzz Out Of Tesco"

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'Tesco insisted yesterday the disposable rings - which last 20 minutes and have a small vibrating pad to enhance the pleasure of women during sex - were not sex toys but part of the health and family planning range.' (Today's Independent.)

Twenty minutes? That's longer than most of you men last.;)

So Tealeaf's red top thread is misleading, they aren't sex toys at all, they are part of a family planning range.

Though I don't know how they will help with family planning except they are produced by Durex, or perhaps wives will tell amourous husbands to go and play with their ring.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

I agree with Spuggie on this one. My 7year old asks enough questions without being prompted to ask more in the supermarket.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

I don't know for sure as I haven't seen this product, but any overtly sexual packaging would have to be sold in a seperate section of the store, with a sign forbidding anyone from entering who was under eighteen, I suspect this won't be the case.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Tesco's slogan is 'Every little helps' - may be they should change it to 'Helps every little one'!

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Why do they only stock them in small size?

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

No they stock them in - small, medium and liar sizes.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Seeing as you appear to be the expert Gary, is the position of the pad dependant on which way round the women is? Or can you use a few at once with the pads in different positions?

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

are they small enough and discreet enough to steal? cos I aint going to the 10 or less counter to buy a cock ring!

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Thank you for acknowledging my expertise in women, and also my period managing Scotland's larges adult 'lifestyle' store.

I will of course be more than happy to help you with any little problems you have, but it will probably spare your blushes if you pm me your questions, rather than me answer them here.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

i dont see the point in cock rings coz cock fighting has been illigal in the uk for years

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Been reliably informed that the stocks aint in yet. :(

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

You could ask them to give them a ring when your ring comes in Spuggie.

You can post a consumer report when you've road tested one..

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Ok any other requests?

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

wash your hands afterwards

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Of course :)

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Found a willing party to do a trial on them.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

I think that the fact that they are in the family planning department of the store suggests you should use them with one other person, not a 'party' full of people.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Can you make a decent pie with a Rampant Rabbit? - does it come with its own gravy? Perhaps a carrot or two ....

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

No, but you can use them to whip up a rather good salmon mouse, apparently.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

I thought you preferred chocolate mouse Rindy

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Spoil sport. :(

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

You get the balls as well.

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Do you get clubcard points for your purchases?!? ;) hehe

Can you inagine Prunella Scales and Jane Horrocks..advertising that range...... (shudder!)

Katie x

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrr now this solves the wondering !!!
Wondered why my neighbour choose to shop at out of town Tesco rather than Asda.
Now i know why ! :D :p :D :p :D :p :eek:

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

hmmmm clubcard points can get you airmiles.....(£2.50 per 60 miles)

.......wonder how far a vibrator can get you?!?

....skeggy?

xx

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Essex you mean or at a pinch Blackpool. :rolleyes:

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

ooo just checked my clubcard statement....

....im off to australia next week ;)

God bless tesco.....every little really does help! xx

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picks oneself up off the floor from laughing ! must remember to buy some tenna lady's. :D

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

As far as you want depends on what you are up for.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Speaking as someone who got thrown out of an Anne Summers shop for laughing, I could do without this. It's hard enough work getting the shopping done now, without collapsing with helpless laughter in the vibrator isle.

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

At least there will be fewer women clogging up the isle as they will be all be in the "toy section."

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

don't sell em at haslingden was there yesterday notthat i was going out of my way just to look it's was shopping day

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

just a quick detour off thread... a shop on the main high street in Cleveleys has just closed,,, and on the window last week was a big notice,,,,(SEX SHOP ,opening soon,,,staff wanted ,would suit O.A.P'S..LADIES DO YOU WANT TO TOP UP YOUR PENSION...):eek:
Well it caused a great deal of talk..... and much laughter when it turned out to be the guys who were refurbishing the shop having a bit of fun......
.......by the way its going to be a shoe shop .......................:D

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

bet it did though i bet the school kids had a right laugh when walking past :D

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If it was you didnt consider it did you Granny?? :eek: ;)

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i wouldent have been any good... i wouldent have known what to do with half of the stuff.... :o :o :o :o :o :o

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the shoe shop is aptly named.....its ........HOTTER......... lol

Re: Sex toys for sale in Tesco
 

Hotter than what?

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I agree Tealeaf.. b*ll*ks to Tesco.. they have lost the plot in search of more profits