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Taggy 24-12-2008 06:49

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by onlyme (Post 662679)
I dont think so. I think it may be a case of 'unplanned' rather than 'planned' in the majority of cases. And the days of getting pregnant and 'bingo theres your house' are long gone.

Afraid i disagree, whilst some of these girls may be physically mature, the same cannot be said of them mentally. They often use pregnancy as a way of hanging on to a relationship also. £500 and £40 a week may be small feed to a lot of people, but to them its not, we are talking about people who are not used to seeing large amounts of money, so to them initially it does seem a lot. Plus its the security of knowing this money is guaranteed and they wont need to go out and work for it.

As for being a ticket to a house, well i'm afraid it still is. OK there may not be anywhere near as much Council/Social housing as there was (Or should be), but a single mother with child will still be pretty much at the top of the housing ladder. They may have to declare themselves homeless, and face a short stay in a hostel for a while, but i personally know of people who have done this, despite coming from good homes, with responsible parents. In their immaturity, they just want to break away, and do their own thing, they think because they have a child and a home it makes them Adults! Social services, in this politically "Incorrect" age have i'm afraid made this easy for them.

Its interesting to note in other european countries like Spain for example, being a single Mother is frowned upon, and there are no specific benefits that they can claim. Hence more children stay at home for longer, including the ones who do have unplanned pregnancies.


Best Regards - Taggy

jaysay 24-12-2008 09:59

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Neil (Post 662670)
Because the woman could end up on her own with the child while the man carrys on with his life.

That was the point was trying to make Neil, not being disrespectful to women, blazey may beat university, but sometimes she doesn't think logically. Its always the woman that's left holding the baby, it always has and always will be and its no use coming out with the old cherry it takes two, there is only one left with the responsibility. There are women that see that as a meal ticket aka Karen Matthews who classed her had outs as her wages and unfortunately she is not an isolated case

blazey 24-12-2008 13:00

Re: Maternity Grant
 
I have four friends currently with new babies and their childrens dads are all around supporting their ladies. One of those friends even has a mortgage with her fella. There are a lot of girls from my school year who have kids and I know at least one of the girls has two children.

I can't think of a single one of them who doesn't have a job though and/or a boyfriend with them who is working or training to provide for their family.

My point is that yes, young girls may be starting families at a young age but in my experience around here they're doing quite a good job of getting out and getting jobs and carrying on with their lives.

We're lucky that there are creches at college and support available for young mothers and fathers if they wish to make use of the services. I think the bigger problem is helping those who have grown dependent on the system get back into work if they've lived fine enough without.

I do personally find it quite physically sickening when i hear of another friend getting pregnant because I do wonder how they will cope when I see threads like this and people saying its a massively expensive problem, but luckily they've always either had their boyfriends working long hours to scrape by or they've decided to go out to college themselves and train to make something of themselves. Sometimes a baby encourages someone to not give up and life and learn to value the opportunities they're given.

And then sadly some don't, but I think those people are a select minority and when their 'benefit baby' grows up into a child that begins achieving things at school and so on then hopefully they'll at least learn to appreciate that its not just about the benefits but about love and pride and all sorts of other things too. And its those things that make someone bad or good in my opinion, how much love and pride they receive from their mothers as children.

lancsdave 24-12-2008 13:12

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jaysay (Post 662726)
Its always the woman that's left holding the baby, it always has and always will be

Not correct I'm afraid. 11% of single parents are male.

Lilly 24-12-2008 13:17

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by lancsdave (Post 662775)
Not correct I'm afraid. 11% of single parents are male.

Some single parents are male but, as you have just pointed out, they are in a small minority.

The majority are women.

It may take two to make a baby but, I agree with Neil, if the woman doesn't want a baby it is down to her to make sure it doesn't happen.

It is much easier for a man to desert his responsibilities for a baby than it is for a woman. A man can scarper as soon as two blue lines appear on the pregnancy test.

Not so for a woman.

jaysay 24-12-2008 13:22

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly (Post 662776)
Some single parents are male but, as you have just pointed out, they are in a small minority.

The majority are women.

It may take two to make a baby but, I agree with Neil, if the woman doesn't want a baby it is down to her to make sure it doesn't happen.

It is much easier for a man to desert his responsibilities for a baby than it is for a woman. A man can scarper as soon as two blue lines appear on the pregnancy test.

Not so for a woman.

Spot on Lilly, nothing more to be said

blazey 24-12-2008 13:24

Re: Maternity Grant
 
The statistics for single parents don't state how many of them are supported financially by the other parent. 'Single' doesn't necessarily mean you have had a child on your own, the parents could be divorced or widowed etc.

Then you always have the problem of statistics being biased or manipulated to suit the purpose. You can never be sure what the situation is really unless you do your own research and most normal people don't have time or the means to do that!

lancsdave 24-12-2008 13:25

Re: Maternity Grant
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly (Post 662776)
Some single parents are male but, as you have just pointed out, they are in a small minority.

The majority are women.

It may take two to make a baby but, I agree with Neil, if the woman doesn't want a baby it is down to her to make sure it doesn't happen.

It is much easier for a man to desert his responsibilities for a baby than it is for a woman. A man can scarper as soon as two blue lines appear on the pregnancy test.

Not so for a woman.

Not disagreeing with that, just a minor correction to the original comment :D


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