To squat or not to squat
 

Not sure how far and how crazy political correctness and ‘mustn’t upset anyone’ has gone in your neck of the woods. Must say though that I don’t think it is always the people from other countries themselves who object to certain practices and phrases but the do-gooders who have nothing better to do and need to get a life.

Over the past few years I have read with disbelief how we must not do this or do that over here in order so as not to offend people from certain countries who are now living here – some things so extreme and stupid that if it wasn’t so serious it would be laughable. It’s quite pathetic really.

However, the latest suggestion takes the cake. A Professor (a leading pathologist) says “it is time we acknowledged the cultural needs of our large migrant population”. He has written a page on toilet etiquette and says it would be sensible to install squat toilets in new buildings (it turns out several buildings actually already have these!) – he says he has in fact had to instruct some of his staff the correct way to use the Western-style ones.

I certainly have no objection to people keeping to some of their customs and their religion - after all there are lots of different religions being practised in our society and whatever turns you on so be it, but at least I think Western-style toilets should be sufficient for their other need to ‘express’.

So, my question is, are you squatting over there or still having a flush?

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Me? I am having a flush.
I have tried the ethnic toilets and managed to pee on my feet......still, I won't get chilblains will I?

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

No need to build special toilets, if they want to pee and poo like they do back home, just dig a hole in the dirt outside. It`s then their choice which they use.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

hang on a sec so these are crap pots and not footbaths then

now i know why my feet smell of curry at least

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Should've gone to Specsavers accyman.....should've gone to Specsavers!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Flush for me. I see problems with squatting ... unless one is camping ... How do you do the crossword? Smoke your fag? Drink your first cup of mud? The morning dump is sometimes the high point of my day:D I know ... I should get a life;) A morning squat just wouldn't do it for me.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I think that perhaps the food these people eat means that they really haven't time to do much more than get their pants down...let alone even consider doing a crossword.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Squatting when defecating is allegedly a healthier position -
The ORIGINAL Squatty Potty toilet stool - Official Website
and doesn't mean a hole in the ground necessarily.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

if you really want one you can get them on Amazon at fast delivery
Amazon.co.uk: squatty potty

:D:D:hidewall:

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I remember working at the dairy back in the early 70s, they employed quite a few Asians, you sure as hell didn't want to use the loo at work I'll tell you:D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

You really dislike all that "foreign muck", don't you, hon;):D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I certainly do. I have a very sensitive gag reflex when it comes to curry.
I can deal with any amount do bodily fluid without it having any effect, but the slightest hint of curry spices leaves my last meal looking for the emergency exit.....with it's running shoes on!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

As the rhyme says " in days of old when knights were bold and toilets weren't invented ,you dug a hole behind a wall and sat there quite contented ":D:tongueout or when i started work on the sites you got a cement bag:D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

That's a bit different from the rhyme I knew.
It was women that weren't invented.
It included telegraph poles.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

A cement bag:eek: Luxury!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I once had to go to the loo when I was at a train station in Brittany. I noticed a woman enter and then come straight out of the Ladies and nip in to the Mens. A bit weird but hey ho I thought and nipped in to the vacant toilet only to find one of those hole in the floor jobbies. What a dirty, stinking, blocked up, vomit inducing sight awaited me. Blocked to the hilt and overflowing with filthy toilet paper strewn round the top. I quickly vacated the 'powder room' and went to the mens toilet next door. Guess what? It was a lovely clean 'sit on' toilet. Charming!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

If you squat, you won't get that satisfactory plop, plop, plop, which is integral to the whole experience.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Sounds like you're a bit constipated!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Nor will you have to afraid of collateral damage as the previous night's gallon of bitter and chicken vindaloo gush out.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Used for wiping as well eric , although the lime could cause a bit of a problem:D you could end up with an ar** like a dragons nostril :D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

That sounds so much funnier than a 'bum like a blood orange'.......now I have to go and change my drawers:D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

What about the Japanese flag Margaret????:D:D:D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Rusty sheriffs badge, chocolate starfish.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Please, no....no more!
I've just put clean pj's on :)

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Sorry Margaret an old Irish chap i used to work with was quite flowery when it came to describing his toilet and bowel movements , given half a chance, and the dragons nostril one was one of his made me laugh to when i heard it for the first time.:D:D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Nil Taurus excreta!!!!! I honestly had no idea my original posting on this thread would evoke such a response. Love it! Just to add extra spice to the curry, here is more information from the newspaper article referred to.
The Professor’s book includes a diagram with a cross through a stick figure standing on a toilet seat. The mind boggles - I have a picture in my mind (unfortunately) of someone trying to balance in a standing position on a toilet seat while aiming to hit the mark. Class act!!!! The instructions also include an appeal not to throw water on the floor?????
One of the Universities in Adelaide has ‘culturally sensitive amenities’ to cater for staff and students from more than 90 countries – which include ‘culturally appropriate ablutions’, and a second University has also installed squat toilets and special washrooms.
A 3rd University, while it does not have these toilets, has placed a sign on cubicle doors asking users not to stand on seats. THAT picture just won’t go away.

It’s all a load of crap to me……

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Which could be an advantage if you are stuck in Mobile.;)

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

During my nursing days I once(well more than once) took an Asian lady to the bathroom to enable her to have a wash.
She didn't put the plug in the wash basin, but proceeded to cup the water in both hands and the aim it roughly at the region of her face.
I don't know who was the wettest when we came out, her, or me.
She didn't use soap and she didn't touch her skin.....she just sort of bombarded it with cold water.
I had to stay with her because she had just had an op and was very unsteady on her feet.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

It's all very well saying it's a healthier position!
I couldn't squat down in the first place. If I did I'd probably end up sat on the hole and then I couldn't get up. Sat there for hours till someone rescued you- that could give you piles!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Gordon, the squatty potty overcomes that.....it is like a stool(no pun intended) that butts (!) up to the toilet and makes you take the squatting position without having to get down and dirty.....have a look at the link posted by Mick.
Quite ingenious really.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Take up autocoprophagia. In a little while, those pale bits you eat will be a delicacy; and the answer any question of standing or sitting will matter not at all to you.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

That is a disgusting idea.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

But one of interest.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Well to you, perhaps.....it certainly doesn't interest me.
I associate this practice with those unfortunate people who used to be locked up in the institutions for the mentally infirm....it is the kind of thing that they were commonly found doing.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Now, now ... when someone told you, and I've no doubt you've been told quite often, to "go eat shiite", they were merely insulting you ... probably for good reason. You didn't have to take it literally.:rolleyes:

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

And it doesn't have to be your own.....I'm sure if you are that interested in this pursuit Graham.....we can take up a collection for you.

To squat or not to squat
 

Margaret I for one shan't be donating as you should know by now, I don't give a shiet for any newbie fool like this.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

It sounds like he did though. Comes over as quite a connoisseur.

He certainly talks it.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

A good and generous idea ... if ideas can be generous ... and I would expect no less (not you, bud;)) from AccyWebbers. And to drink with his meal ... I could have a good feed of chicken vindaloo, wash it down with a few king cans of Dead Elephant or some Chateaux Porch Climber, and bottle the inevitable result.

To squat or not to squat
 

Somehow I suspect the treatment you propose would only add to this weirdos pleasure, a very tricky process I would imagine a little like refusing to whip a masochist, as a cure, are you being cruel to be kind? Or are you giving him greater pleasure when he suffers the disappointment of feeling no pain?

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I don't [TRANSGRESSION! abbreviation] take your comment seriously. Yet it is funny.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Ah, a sort of Jacob's join?

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

No.....not all. If that were the case we would have to eat with you....not for me!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

One gets only one chance to make a first impression. Even upon you, Margaret. You and some of your fellow correspondents are quite accomplished bullies in this medium. Such fun!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Not bullies, you see Graham, we like to have discussion, heck we will tolerate anything on here, but if your downright pig awkward and obstinate well we don't like that.:D
Happy new year.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

If I am indeed one of those obstinate and pig-awkward folk then am I to be universally disliked?

Have a happy new year. My layby lover has gone (retreated?) to bed without inviting me to follow. However, I remain in good company - the Staffordshire's.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

The universe is a very big place, no doubt if you searched long enough you`ll probably find someone.:D

To squat or not to squat
 

Get over yourself, dislike you? I think it's more that we pity you for the pathetic way you come across.
:)

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Seems that Graham H gets some sort of satisfaction from an odd sense of being disliked. He appears to give himself kudos the more disliked he is, almost wanting to be universally so. What a strange man. You are right, Less, he IS pathetic - as well as being obnoxious in his waffling comments.
Still, it takes all sorts to make a world - thank goodness his little world isn't mine!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

I know I shouldn’t ask this because he’s sure to tell me and I’m not that certain I really want to know, but here goes - maybe I’m a bit slow at catching on but what IS a layby lover? (As per posting 46 on this thread).
As far as I know a layby is something you use when you can’t afford to buy an item so you stick it on layby, pay if off in instalments and get it when it’s paid for.
Another layby is where vehicles pull in when the driver needs to take a break, and then there’s the nautical one.
But a layby lover??????

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

You are quite right about only getting one chance of making an impression.
Your impression of me as a bully is risible.
But if you feel intimidated by my posts you know where to find the report button.
You have used it before and doubtless will use it again.
The moderator will then decide if my post constitutes bullying and will act appropriately.

I am always delighted to see new members join Accyweb because I believe it is the best forum bar none.
Lots of new members come and fit in well. They post opinions which give something to the forum.....they give freshness, newness and we very often have a lively discussion.
Since you joined(and forgive me if I haven't read everything you have posted but my life has been hectic of late) your posts have often been scathing, negative and in some instances rude.

That is my opinion, and it goes a long way in determining my impression of you.
In fact in my welcome post to you I asked a question which you answered tersely and quoted forum rules at me

So there you go Graham. The forum is a good place if you are a good poster.
It is not such a good place if you aren't.
I am not the arbiter of what is good. All the forum members are the arbiters...and so far you seem to come up lacking!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Those words appear in the Status Quo song Accident Prone, from the album If You Can't Stand The Heat.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

On the forum, much as in life......we get what we give out.
Happy New Year Graham. I hope you survived it and didn't become just a statistic.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Thank heavens for that.
You had me thinking you were into dogging!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Thanks, Margaret. You are so gracious. Have another happy year, along with all the others.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

No. I might include that activity among my resolutions, if anyone cares a fig to know that.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Thank you Graham. As long as 2014 does not emulate its predecessor I will be happy.'13' was not good for me.
See, my impression is changing already.

To squat or not to squat
 

No it isn't you often do Ken Dodd at Christmas, now do Tommy Cooper and make GH disappear.
:)

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Less...I can't find my Fez! :D

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Over here they're naughty ladies, (often found in laybys) offering gratification in various forms to raging reps & rigid roadsters. :eek:

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Please don't. I'd hate to accidentally come across you on one of my late evening expeditions. Could spoil my night.

To squat or not to squat
 

His version of dogging won't interfere with yours, he goes out late at night to get a snack from their poo bins!

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

Been busy, y'all must understand. So pleasing to find mention of my Graham Hartley persona persists among the discerning types. Perhaps I styled it so.

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

spoil = soil, if you're finger careless

Re: To squat or not to squat
 

..and the world revolves entirely around Graham Hartley - that is, according to Graham Hartley.

To squat or not to squat
 

Perhaps you should check the date of the post?
It is from the last time you'd stopped taking your meds and were insisting on being a pain.