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-   -   Why women are better... (https://www.accringtonweb.com/forum/f71/why-women-are-better-12335.html)

lettie 20-06-2005 17:55

Why women are better...
 
  1. We can get rid of leg hair without pretending that we do a lot of cycling/swimming, or any other sport that would require aerodynamic legs.
  2. We absently hum tunes from musicals without anyone being suspect of our sexuality.
  3. When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's sad.
  4. We can use cosmetics should we wake up looking like something the cat dragged in.
  5. We can wear platforms - which is why there is no such thing as a "short woman's complex."
  6. We don't have to get our strength up between sessions... ... and it's much easier for us to get laid in the first place.
  7. We can get off with teenagers without being called dirty old perverts.
  8. We never ejaculate prematurely.
  9. We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynaecological disorder excuses.
  10. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
  11. We know that Tetris is the computer game to end all games.
  12. We got off the Titanic first.
  13. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin and gorgeous - they look like complete dicks in ours.
  14. We have total control over our eyebrows.
  15. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
  16. It's cool to be a daddy's girl. It's sad to be a mommy's boy.
  17. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
  18. The thrill of surprising people by being good at darts... and pool..... and football.
  19. We live longer, so we can be cantankerous old biddies wearing inappropriate clothes and shouting at strangers.
  20. Men die earlier so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
  21. We know that games are fun, but don't believe there's a direct correlation between the size of our scores and the size of our genitals.
  22. Taxis stop for us.
  23. We get drunk quicker and cheaper.
  24. We have no desire to arrange our possessions in alphabetical order. Ever!
  25. We've never fancied a cartoon character or the central figure in a computer game.
  26. It does not enhance our social standing to understand the inner workings of a 'ruck' (or any other rugby thing). But we look INCREDIBLY cool if we do.
  27. We never recognise ourselves in aspects of Mr Bean. Ever.
  28. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
Sorry........... We are just better! :D

Sparkologist 20-06-2005 18:01

Re: Why women are better...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by lettie
  1. We can get rid of leg hair without pretending that we do a lot of cycling/swimming, or any other sport that would require aerodynamic legs.

  1. Didn't you set fire to the bed clothes, the last time you used a blow torch? :rolleyes:

Sparkologist 20-06-2005 18:04

Re: Why women are better...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by lettie
2. We absently hum tunes from musicals without anyone being suspect of our sexuality.

You only hum 'em 'cos it sounds like a tom-cat being neutered, when you sing! :p

jpest1 20-06-2005 18:11

Re: Why women are better...
 
We got off the Titanic first.

:rolleyes: Yep so we could use you as life support !!!

WINGY 20-06-2005 18:11

Re: Why women are better...
 
More More More!! come on full on fisty fight!! lol

Sparkologist 20-06-2005 18:22

Re: Why women are better...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by lettie
3. When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous.

Well, at least your neighbours now know why the street lights go dim, when you plug it in!

Quote:

Originally Posted by lettie
3. ...When men buy a blow up doll it's sad.

I'm more than happy with the service that I'm getting from my Latex Lettie, thank you very much! :o :D

Steph 20-06-2005 21:32

Re: Why women are better...
 
Now now............no cat fights

Reidy 20-06-2005 21:50

Re: Why women are better...
 
round two.....................

jpest1 20-06-2005 22:40

Re: Why women are better...
 
We get drunk quicker and cheaper.

:rolleyes: Why do you think we take you out. It saves us time and money

Less 20-06-2005 22:49

Re: Why women are better...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jpest1

:rolleyes: Why do you think we take you out. It saves us time and money

I prefer the technique of letting some-one else get them drunk then when she falls out with him and storms off, you follow and offer a sympathetic ear agreeing that all men are B*stards (she is of course correct) but because you are a good listener you aren't like the rest! Ah the cheap nights you can have with that routine!

:rofl38::rofl38::rofl38::rofl38:

jpest1 20-06-2005 23:01

Re: Why women are better...
 
:cool: Yes les been there done that am still wearing the t shirt.

P.S. just nearly wet myself laughing at your post about spaghetti pan and the reply's

Really good

big al 20-06-2005 23:13

Re: Why women are better...
 
Remember that God was a woman-until she changed her mind!

jpest1 20-06-2005 23:40

Re: Why women are better...
 
:( That I think has no answer. Unless he only thought he was a woman to start with?

Less 20-06-2005 23:48

Re: Why women are better...
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jpest1
:( That I think has no answer. Unless he only thought he was a woman to start with?

God MUST have been a woman, no man would have been so cruel as to invent such a domineering 'weaker?' sex!

jpest1 21-06-2005 00:20

Re: Why women are better...
 
The so called weaker sex are only doing what we let them do !! I know I can hear the boos And hisses from here :eek: :eek: :eek:

staggeringman 21-06-2005 01:29

Re: Why women are better...
 
  1. We can wear platforms - which is why there is no such thing as a "short woman's complex."
  2. Its not the complex we are on about here! its the fact that we men built platforms to go out to sea????AND ALL WE GET BACK IS A LOAD OF GAS.

MUMMIBOO 21-06-2005 09:50

Re: Why women are better...
 
Ok I Got One for you:-


Why is a Man's Best Friend a DOG and

A Woman's Best Friend Is A DIAMOND?

I think that just explain's EVERYTHING.

(don't you):p

big al 21-06-2005 13:44

Re: Why women are better...
 
Remember also the four most used modes of communication:
Telephone
Telegraph
Television
Tell a woman!
Also women have a different perspective on DIY to men
For men it means: Do It Yourself
For women it means: Done It yet!

staggeringman 21-06-2005 17:06

Re: Why women are better...
 
  1. We don't have to get our strength up between sessions... ... and it's much easier for us to get laid in the first place.
thats because you women are always laid out anyway(a bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush).....lol

big al 22-06-2005 11:19

Re: Why women are better...
 
[QUOTE=lettie]
  1. When we buy a vibrator it is glamorous. When men buy a blow up doll it's sad.
  2. We know that games are fun, but don't believe there's a direct correlation between the size of our scores and the size of our genitals.
  3. We have no desire to arrange our possessions in alphabetical order. Ever!

1 Blow up dolls are good for a mans esteem, They don't answer back, get into the required position without arguing & don't need expensive meal & booze to get sex.

2 Heard there is a direct feminine relationship to size of mouth to genitals? True or false?

3 Because you are too busy altering the strategicaly placed items us men have taken the time to arrange- so we can find b****r all after!http://www.accringtonweb.com/forum/i...cons/icon6.gif

Bazf 22-06-2005 16:12

Re: Why women are better...
 
A Man is a Man for Life
A women is Horney until shes a wife............

big al 22-06-2005 22:59

Re: Why women are better...
 
When you are courting a woman you wish you could eat her,
After twenty years of marriage you wish you had!


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