Accrington Web - Computer Terminology

BIT: A word used to describe computers, as in "My computer cost quite a bit."

BOOT: What your friends want to give you because you spend so much time bragging about your computer.

BUG: What your eyes do after you've been staring at the computer screen for ore than five hours.

CHIPS: The fattening food computer user eat, to avoid leaving their keyboards even for meals.

COPY: What your son has to do at school because he spends more time at the computer than studying.

CURSOR: What you turn into when your computer goes haywire, as in "You ~#~a/o&4% computer!"

DISK: What goes out in your back after bending over a computer keyboard for five hours at a stretch.

DUMP: Where all your former hobbies wind up after you install your computer.

ERROR: What you made the first time you walked into a computer showroom to "just look."

EXPANSION UNIT: The new room you built on to your home for your computer and all its peripherals.

FILE: What your secretary does to her nails all day long, now that the computer does her work.

FLOPPY: The condition of a computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food.

HARDWARE: Tools, lawnmowers and rakes you haven't laid a finger on, since getting your computer.

IBM: The missile your family members would like to drop on your computer to have your attention again.

MENU: What you wont see again after buying a computer because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant.

PROGRAMS: What you read to see what was on your television before you got hooked on computers.

RAM: What you instinctively do to the side of your computer when it's not doing what it should.

RETURN: What lots of people do with their computers after only a week and a half.

WINDOW: What you heave your computer out of.