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Less 06-02-2016 15:15

How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
1/ Decide you would like to have poached eggs for a change.

2/Use a well tested recipe for doing them in a micro-wave i.e. bung a couple of eggs in a mug cover with water then place a saucer on top. Believe me, the eggs get poached to perfection...



...normally!

3/ Press the button for 1min on full power.

4/ check after the beep to find that the eggs are only half cooked.

5/Ignore the fact that this is strange and press for another minute.

6/Rush into the kitchen when you hear a muffled explosion.

7/ switch off micro-wave and check contents.

8/ discover a saucer split in half and egg plastered in every conceivable corner of the oven.

9/ stick fingers around the bigger bits before they cool and congeal to the oven.

10/ Eat whilst still warm by sucking fingers.

11/Look at the mess and decide, today is Saturday, this mess can wait until Sunday to be cleaned up.

12/Don't forget to let everyone else know what has happened, maybe, just, maybe you will get some sympathy.

13/ (Unlucky for some), don't hold your breath, sympathy is a scarce element amongst the folk you know.


Margaret Pilkington 06-02-2016 15:37

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Oh Less, it is easy to poach eggs in a pan.
I know you might have to wait a bit longer, but they turn out very nicely. You can also get poaching pods which mean that the washing up is reduced.......and the eggs never stick to these pods.
Spray the inside of the microwave with soapy water,leave it overnight........this should make the cleaning up a bit easier.
Sorry your poached eggs were such a mess.

DaveinGermany 06-02-2016 15:38

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Less (Post 1160449)
12/Don't forget to let everyone else know what has happened, maybe, just, maybe you will get some sympathy.

Sympathy, really? On here, with this crowd? Mind you, you'll get "Schadenfreude" by the bucket! :D

Margaret Pilkington 06-02-2016 15:40

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
He didn't want a bucket of schadenfreude....he just wanted a poached egg to dip his soldiers into :)

DaveinGermany 06-02-2016 15:48

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Well if there's no dippy egg, they've probably gone AWOL, by now! :)

Less 06-02-2016 15:49

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
I'm glad there's a step 13.

Less 06-02-2016 16:02

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
It's times like this I miss having a wife about the place, because I could have closed the door and left it for her to discover, then, as she screams hysterically about the state of the oven, I could say, "Oh yeah I had a slight mishap and forgot".

Then run like mad for the door, leaving the house for six hours knowing she would clean it up while she's cursing 'that useless swine' that can't look after himself.

Rowlf 06-02-2016 16:20

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Perhaps better to stick to a pan in future Less. I like them done with some vinegar in the water. I have tried the microwave but I didn't cover the cup. Worked ok. Good luck next time.

Margaret Pilkington 06-02-2016 16:30

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Less (Post 1160464)
leaving the house for six hours knowing she would clean it up while she's cursing 'that useless swine' that can't look after himself.

that would be me.....I would fizz and fume, but I would have to clean it up.
A bit like my other half juggling with melted candle wax and spreading it all over the carpet. He whistled tunelessly and nonchalantly while watching me try to get it out of the carpet.......and said something like 'it's not the end of the world'.....well, it damn nearly was.....for him!

Margaret Pilkington 06-02-2016 16:41

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
http://www.accringtonweb.com/forum/b...h-trouble.html

This is the blog record of that event.
The carpet was discarded last December.....we now have varnished boards.....but I bought rugs.
We got the rugs on the first of March and by the third of March he had singed the living room rug by letting hot embers fall out of the wood burner......so not much has changed.

Less 07-02-2016 10:33

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
I think I've worked out what happened to cause the bang.
As I said I've used this method before and all turned out well. I think what caused this was that the eggs I was using were very large so when I removed the saucer to check and found them only half cooked back went the saucer which due to the heat of the water would have condensation on it making a seal around the mug turning the whole thing into a pressure cooker with no vent.

Now if I can just turn my mind to cleaning up I can try again and prove the theory.

Michael1954 07-02-2016 10:39

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Less (Post 1160464)
It's times like this I miss having a wife about the place, because I could have closed the door and left it for her to discover, then, as she screams hysterically about the state of the oven, I could say, "Oh yeah I had a slight mishap and forgot".

Then run like mad for the door, leaving the house for six hours knowing she would clean it up while she's cursing 'that useless swine' that can't look after himself.

I've not been feeling too well these last few days, so thanks for this which made me chuckle! Why have I not been feeling well? Here goes...

Mikey's Top Tips

If you're going to faint, try to select a soft landing area. The bathroom is not recommended as you will finish up breaking your glasses and nose. The glasses will also cut you under your eye. As you continue your fall to the ground you will also bang your hip and finger, causing you to exclaim: "Oh my gosh!"

Second Tip

When you finally get to your feet, DO NOT faint again in the same location. Otherwise you will exclaim: "Oh no! Not again!"

Margaret Pilkington 07-02-2016 10:52

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Oh, Michael......sorry to hear that you have not been well. I hope these tips were not formulated as the result of experience.
(sorry...just re read it and they were....how horrible for you)
Look after yourself and I hope you are soon feeling a lot better.

Less 07-02-2016 10:59

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Michael1954 (Post 1160514)
"Oh no! Not again!"

Seems like you and a bowl of petunias have a great deal in common!

Quote by Douglas Adams: ?Curiously enough, the only thing that went thro...?

Margaret Pilkington 07-02-2016 12:19

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
imself went into town today and came back with a microwave egg cooker...he paid the princely sum of 50 pence for this

Less 07-02-2016 12:20

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington (Post 1160528)
imself went into town today and came back with a microwave egg cooker...he paid the princely sum of 50 pence for this

P.M. it to me. (Still waiting for a volunteer to clean a microwave oven).

Margaret Pilkington 07-02-2016 12:25

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
I will post a picture of the egg cooker.....but apologies Less...I won't be coming over to clean your microwave:)

Margaret Pilkington 07-02-2016 12:34

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
1 Attachment(s)
Less here is a picture of the egg cooker.
Himself saw it on a market stall.......there were a few of them , but he knows not to buy more than one until he ask been given the OK from me.
(that makes him sound hen pecked - he isn't......but he knows that i hate having stuff cluttering up the place if it is not going to be used)
it takes one minute cooking time in a microwave that is 650w......a shorter cooking time if you have have a high power microwave(or reduce the power)...the egg then has to stand for 20-30 seconds...and you can eat it out of the pot like you would a boiled egg

Less 07-02-2016 12:57

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington (Post 1160531)
I won't be coming over to clean your microwave:)

Looks like it will have to wait until Monday then, I'm busy counting, grading and alphabetizing my Saudi Arabian sand grain collection, an important job that I've dreaded doing but at the moment seems far more attractive than the alternative.
http://afghan-arabiawild.com/Regan%2...unes%20cmp.JPG

This is me pictured in front of a small part of my collection.

Margaret Pilkington 07-02-2016 13:04

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
I think that job you are on now will take you way past Monday Less!
Man up, don those fetching marigolds, mix up some fairy liquid in some hot water.....And go to work on an egg.
Hey, that would make a damn good advertising slogan:).

Less 07-02-2016 13:19

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Will you stop interrupting? I've lost count and will have to start again...

...one grain of sand, two grains of sand, three grains of sand, oh, it's brew time!

Less 07-02-2016 13:51

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
While I'm having my brew I'll catch up with this months issue of 'Sand Collecters Of The World Magazine'. I nearly didn't sign up for it but the first issue was half price, each issue comes with an individually wrapped grain of sand and once you start collecting you can't miss any of the magazines or your collection will never be complete.

I see on the letters page there are rumours that the special edition Blackpool beach give away bonus pull out pages, will be in issue 1,000,597,805,799 if they can get it to press on time. I can't wait.

maxthecollie 07-02-2016 14:26

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Is that a Thwaites brew?

Less 07-02-2016 14:45

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by maxthecollie (Post 1160540)
Is that a Thwaites brew?

Don't be silly, it would be irresponsible to sort such a valuable collection whilst intoxicated, I'd never forgive myself if I was to mix some of my Australian red with my original Lebanese black.

Here's an interesting fact about my Lebanese collection, my dad was a Desert Rat and he smuggled some out in his boots just so I could get an early start ahead of all those geeks that just jumped on the bandwagon when sand became a popular pastime.
http://afghan-arabiawild.com/Regan%2...unes%20cmp.JPG

Here's a picture of me in front of a small part of my Lebanese collection.

Do you know that back in 1957 we had our Annual Convention in Southport and the tide hasn't been able to get up the beach since then, just because some silly sod was clumsy and allowed his Moroccan Gold to spill off his exhibition table.

Eric 07-02-2016 23:41

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Less (Post 1160449)

13/ (Unlucky for some), don't hold your breath, sympathy is a scarce element

If you want sympathy, you'll find it in the dictionary between "shiite" and "syphilis".;) Maybe pickled eggs would be a better alternative. And they sit quietly in the fridge next to the beer until you need them.

Microwaves are useless ... and they encourage leftovers:mad: ... if there is anything left over it should be eaten cold. A piece of last nite's pizza with not too many cigarette butts in it! Breakfast of champions.:alright:

dotti34 08-02-2016 02:12

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Michael, I do hope you are well on your way to recovery now. Wasn't that so very kind of Less to create a situation to make you feel better, nothing like a good laugh to do just that. He's all heart.

Less, I think we all had a good laugh out of you, sorry about that. I could just picture it. I did once blow up three eggs that I had put in a pan of water to boil - then forgot all about them...until there was an almighty bang as the pan lid blew off. Talk about 'she doesn't even know how to boil an egg' - but I do know how to make them explode! Bit of a mess there as well.

Mick 08-02-2016 05:52

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Less cover the inside of your microwave in cling film next time this will make it easy to clean all the egg off it if it happens again

Don't forget it's pancake day tomorrow this will be a challenge for you to make in the microwave:)
Made fresh not out of a packet:p

Less 12-02-2016 20:34

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
So, there I was this morning, yet again let down by the female of the species, (no Margaret not just you, I do play the helpless male with other women).

I looked at many ways that I could get what was now beginning to be a fossilised version of egg removed from my main form of food warming instument.
Some of you may remember my thread about cleaning a vacuum cleaner in a dish washer,
however to clean a microwave using this method wouldn't work to get at the eggy bits I would have to leave the door of the microwave open AND remove any electrical bits (not enough room).

So I took the bull by the horns, turned on the hot tap and filled a sink with cleaning chemicals.

The problem seemed to be as soon as the water hit the guts it cooled and anything I touched congealed back where it started.

Then I hit on the idea, put the oven on for an hour let it burn everything to a crisp then use a scraper to remove the ashes.

Yep that works except, now I've re-assembled the oven, instead of going beep, beep, beep to signify the end of a cycle, it just sort of goes burp, hic, tilt and game over.

Anyone out there that knows a woman that has natural tendencies towards house cleaning, I'm beginning to believe she could be cheaper than a replacement oven.

Margaret Pilkington 12-02-2016 22:06

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Less, oh dear.....that really sounds like a recipe for disaster.
Not that I am sure that I really believe your version of events(after all this IS anything goes).
I am not going to volunteer to be your cleaning lady......I have enough on. What with doing the cooking for Ma, doing her bag wash and running the vacuum over her carpets when she is feeling a bit limp.
But.....I will give you a tip.
This is for those dishes that are crusty with baked on food(I have no doubt that this would work equally well on the inside of the microwave).....a bowlful of very hot soapy water(the washing up liquid that is on offer at Asda will do for the bubbles).....into this goes a scoop (or a tablespoonful) of soda crystals.
Dunk the offending dish in the water for a few minutes and all the crusty baked on food should come off with little effort.

Now obviously you cannot dunk a microwave in this solution, but what you can do is put some of this wonderful liquid(well, it is wonderful as long as you don't try to drink it) into a squirter bottle(let the liquid cool a bit if you don't want a melted plastic bottle on your hands) and squirt the inside of the microwave with this liquid(not too much or it will just run out onto your counter and the floor).....leave it to digest the grime and then wipe inside the microwave. This should do the job Less.

Less 13-02-2016 08:50

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Actually Margaret, to clean a microwave place a bowl of water in it boil for 10 mins anything crusty gets steamed and softens, oven is nice and warm a damp cloth shifts the lot.
Do try this at home.

Margaret Pilkington 13-02-2016 09:26

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
yes, I know that trick for an ordinarily dirty microwave, but for an industrially dirty one(as yours must have been after the exploding eggs) the soda crystal treatment seemed appropriate.

Less 13-02-2016 09:51

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Margaret Pilkington (Post 1160993)
yes, I know that trick for an ordinarily dirty microwave, but for an industrially dirty one(as yours must have been after the exploding eggs) the soda crystal treatment seemed appropriate.

Nope just steam was all that was needed worked a treat.
:microwave

Margaret Pilkington 13-02-2016 10:22

Re: How To Re-Decorate A Micro-Wave Oven
 
great stuff Less.....now no more exploding eggs.


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