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slinky 10-02-2007 01:02

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Kiwi John (Post 381597)
It would be if she was a nagging old cow.If she wanted to change his attitude,then I wonder did she ever consider trying to 'get alongside' his passion for footy? did he ever try getting along her hobby of spending time with the kids at weekend and being a family man?? she would've had more of a chance of influencing him to lighten up and become more of what she percieves as a family man.Influencing him to be a family man?? ffs ..... he should have been wiling to be a family man when he joined a family??

At the end of the day....... hobbies are hobbies.... family are more important.....where will stanley be when he is a old man sat lonely in a rocking chair??




oh yeah signing younger players who couldn't give a toss about him.......where would his family have been?? yeah right by his side!!

Haggis316 10-02-2007 06:29

Re: Divorce Petition
 
I am not sure that anyone would regard seeing 18 football matches in 15 years of marriage as excessive.

At various times I had all my kids in private school and as I was the only person prepared to make any meaningful sacrifices for this I have seen no games for most of my 15 year marriage.

Between 1991 and 2006 the only games I saw were Sheff Wed v Oldham c 1991, Sheff Wed v Portsmouth in 2002, Sheff Wed v Tranmere in 2003 and Sheff Wed v Stockport in 2003 and Sheff Wed v QPR in 2006.

Including and since Stevenage at home in 2006 I have seen Stanley 13 times.

Is this a crime given that I have spent the last 42 years dreaming of them getting back into what may be their only season in the league?

As for being lonely. Its pretty lonely getting dumped on a regular basis when the wife goes for sleep overs at her parents - that's why I went to Macclesfield with a clear conscience and saw Wednesday win at Stoke on Boxing Day with my dad.

In December 05 my father in law barred me from their Boxing Day celebrations because my commitment to School fees prevented me paying more than £250 towards a week long family holiday that I was excluded from. I only managed to pay the fees because I put my mum's Christmas present towards them.

My kids have led a sheltered existence and just want to play computer games at home. When I go to Stanley we could make a day of it - I pass Bolton Abbey, Harrogate, and Wycoller Country Park - no one wants to know, my wife associates Lancashire with my parents and likes neither.

The present crisis has arisen because my eldest son is very academic and could not settle with normal kids at the local comprehensive.

As a result my wife has unilaterally put our two elder sons into a private school where I would have to gross £32,000 per annum just to pay the fees. With a big mortgage and all our other commitments that's not on.

Me, my dad and my sister all went to Oxford Uni from state school (Ormskirk Grammar) so it was good enough for us.

Most people who know me are surprised I did not petition myself and I talked about it before Christmas but I decided to try and hold it together for the kids. I did offer to suspend my pension contributions for 10 years - not easy given that I am 47 already and have not been able to save what I should because of the private school but that was not enough.

She reckons she will get a job. She has not worked for over 15 years. Any job would have to fit round the school run and where we live is not exactly a hot bed of employment opportunities - it takes nearly an hour to get to York and Hull in the peaks.

As to the cycling I am advised by one of the leading divorce lawyers in the country that my cycling to alleviate a very stressful job where billions of quid rests on my ability to draft documents properly is quite reasonable but if someone wants to put it in a divorce petition I am not going to waste time and money challenging it.

The petition also commented that I come home too late for tea. I am usually home by 7. Not many Leeds law firm partners working 40 miles from home can say that. I am a bit surprised that the person who drafted the petition should think it untoward.

As part of the attempted reconciliation I have not been to football and spent the weekends at home doing jobs including re- roofing my wife's storm damaged gazebo. The probability is I would have been limited to about one Stanley game between now and the end of the season.

Kiwi John 10-02-2007 07:05

Re: Divorce Petition
 
My better half has read this and thinks you are better off without her.You will re group and start to enjoy your life again.She might even have to go out and get a job!Good-luck Haggis.
PS. I just purchased a yee-beaut bike today to allow all 4 of us to go on bike rides.

Outback Ozzy 10-02-2007 09:12

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by cherokee (Post 381598)
WOOOOHHH Hang on kiwi ...first its not you thats losing everything and if it was ...then what???
2nd ... football one thing ..most women can put up with her man having a day out at the match and supporting his team if not joining them in the fun...but bloody cycling etc on top of all that.... ..its just taking the plish when you got family commitments as well.....


think you got to define between wanting a family and wanting your cake and to eat it too

Well that is typical, every male knows all women want is their cake and eating it and ordering more cake.
Reading between the lines of Haggis' following post, it would sound like this wife hates all things from the red rose county, including her husband! Who are we to judge - It would appear that he has tried everything to compromise with his wife and to no avail. And anyway, what is wrong with state schools etc, they were good enough for most folk and it certainly hasn't done me any harm. Although the comment about being Stanley before the kids I believe is a bit tongue in cheek.

Outback Ozzy 10-02-2007 09:14

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by slinky (Post 381599)
At the end of the day....... hobbies are hobbies.... family are more important.....where will stanley be when he is a old man sat lonely in a rocking chair??




oh yeah signing younger players who couldn't give a toss about him.......where would his family have been?? yeah right by his side!!

Accrington Stanley is NOT a hobby, it is a way of life as most any football supporter, be they male or female will tell you.

grego 10-02-2007 09:32

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Haggis316 (Post 381458)
I have tried money and it hasn't bought it.

I prefer to stick with Stanley.

My happiest day is not any family event.

My happiest time is shaking hands with Romy, Rob, Paul and Eric at Woking.

Divorce is probably the best option for you then, good luck with it.

AccyMad 10-02-2007 09:41

Re: Divorce Petition
 
There are always two sides to a story and we are only hearing one side on here, good luck with whatever you decide to do Haggis. Stanley come before most things with me but never before my kids - then again they are usually there with me :)

Red-Osbornello 10-02-2007 09:48

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Aye mate, it's hard to comment on a situation, when you dont really know the whole story...

Whatever you do, you know you have a home with the Stanley Supporters, DRINKS ARE ON... well not me bu someon else I am sure :)

lettie 10-02-2007 16:47

Re: Divorce Petition
 
I have only one piece of advice for Haggis and that is sign the petition and get on with your life.
I did my own divorce in 1998 and saved a ton of money. It cost us £75 each and took 11 weeks from picking up the paperwork to completion. It sounds like you and your wife will be well rid of each other and if it's costing you too much then knock the private school on the head. Be prepared for your wife to try and get as much money out of you as she can, it's human nature to try to come off well. Recent high profile cases have highlighted the role of the housewife and what that role would be worth as a job. They have awarded some women unseemly amounts of cash so be prepared for that.
I am one of the lucky ones, I am a working woman with no kids and I earned a darned sight more than my ex hubby. He did try to claim from me but failed miserably because he couldn't keep his gob shut. As I paid for everything, the house, the bills, the car etc and it was all in my name, I kept the lot.
Be shrewd Haggis and also be prepared to face the fact that the majority of animosity during divorce settlements is brought about by solicitors in order to up their over inflated fees for doing very little work. It is easier to fill out a divorce petition than apply for a passport..:rolleyes:
I wish you luck.:)

Sparkologist 10-02-2007 17:25

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Haggis316 (Post 381637)
...As part of the attempted reconciliation I have not been to football and spent the weekends at home doing jobs including re- roofing my wife's storm damaged gazebo...

The only home improvement you should be doing is to rewire her bath tub!

lindsay ormerod 10-02-2007 17:29

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Sounds like you are well rid Haggis;but keep in contact with your kids,they really are more important than Stanley!

Growler 10-02-2007 18:14

Re: Divorce Petition
 
My family ALWAYS come first. Stanley won't keep me warm at night (and I'd be out of bed in a flash if they tried to!) but I'm lucky that my fiancee doesn't begrudge me going to Stanley ever. It gives her hassle free clothes shopping time.

That said, I've had some of my happiest times when I was single. Good luck with your new lifestyle Haggis. You might grow to love it...

Wynonie Harris 10-02-2007 21:07

Re: Divorce Petition
 
You are so, so wrong, Haggis. You have completely the wrong point of view on this, as you will see in years to come. I'm talking about your view that "it may be their only season in the football league". No chance! We will survive and we will go on to thrive in the league.

Oh yeah, the other little matter you mentioned. Call it a day, mate, and make sure you get a season ticket this summer!

Kiwi John 10-02-2007 21:12

Re: Divorce Petition
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Wynonie Harris (Post 381939)
You are so, so wrong, Haggis. You have completely the wrong point of view on this, as you will see in years to come. I'm talking about your view that "it may be their only season in the football league". No chance! We will survive and we will go on to thrive in the league.

Oh yeah, the other little matter you mentioned. Call it a day, mate, and make sure you get a season ticket this summer!

:D :D :D :D :D

...and those dancing bannana thingys

jaytee 11-02-2007 13:56

Re: Divorce Petition
 
I'm all for trying to keep a family together, but in your case, I think you may as well just fight your corner. And don't lose contact with your kids, you'll regret it. Good luck.


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