Two days went by without any word from Nessa about the information I had sent her.
So today I did a FaceTime to check that she had got my e-mails(we have recently had problems with the broadband connection).
It was good to see her, and to speak to her too.
She admitted that she had been sideswiped by the way things had gone.
She said that when she thought that no-one was going to be there at the funeral she was very upset.
Her grief has been far harder than mine.....and she said she felt overwhelmed with sadness.
When she heard that the committal,service might be webcast, it made her feel better.
She was working Friday night and she went to her manager to find out if there was any way she could get over here for the funeral....her manager said that she would be entitled to seven days compassionate leave....even though she had had seven days when Ma died....she felt that this was a special circumstance.
Vanessa started looking at getting flights....but then the reality hit.....she might get here, get involved in a lockdown and run into,problems getting home...flights, quarantine etc.
It was her husband who talked to her about the practical issues.
So reluctantly she came to the conclusion that it has to be how it has to be.
She will watch the webcast or the video of the service.....then when things get better she will come over and we will celebrate Ma's life in the way we had planned.
I told her that really Ma is long gone....it is just her overcoat we are saying farewell to.
That, maybe this service will help tie up some of the loose ends.....that we will still continue to miss her in our lives, that we will still be influenced by her, but that we have to let her go.
I am hoping to do the eulogy. I have told her that I might get a bit choked or soggy round the edges, but that I would do my best.
This is the penultimate chapter......once Ma is cremated and her ashes have been scattered, we will then get on with our lives.
So today I did a FaceTime to check that she had got my e-mails(we have recently had problems with the broadband connection).
It was good to see her, and to speak to her too.
She admitted that she had been sideswiped by the way things had gone.
She said that when she thought that no-one was going to be there at the funeral she was very upset.
Her grief has been far harder than mine.....and she said she felt overwhelmed with sadness.
When she heard that the committal,service might be webcast, it made her feel better.
She was working Friday night and she went to her manager to find out if there was any way she could get over here for the funeral....her manager said that she would be entitled to seven days compassionate leave....even though she had had seven days when Ma died....she felt that this was a special circumstance.
Vanessa started looking at getting flights....but then the reality hit.....she might get here, get involved in a lockdown and run into,problems getting home...flights, quarantine etc.
It was her husband who talked to her about the practical issues.
So reluctantly she came to the conclusion that it has to be how it has to be.
She will watch the webcast or the video of the service.....then when things get better she will come over and we will celebrate Ma's life in the way we had planned.
I told her that really Ma is long gone....it is just her overcoat we are saying farewell to.
That, maybe this service will help tie up some of the loose ends.....that we will still continue to miss her in our lives, that we will still be influenced by her, but that we have to let her go.
I am hoping to do the eulogy. I have told her that I might get a bit choked or soggy round the edges, but that I would do my best.
This is the penultimate chapter......once Ma is cremated and her ashes have been scattered, we will then get on with our lives.