[susie123]

Yesterday I went for my fortnightly chemotherapy session at my local hospital, Royal Lancaster Infirmary, in the Oncology Unit (that's cancer dept for those unfamiliar with the word. It's a nice place, in the old part of the hospital, (see below, complete with fairytale tower), with small rooms for consultations and larger ones for day patient treatment, with high ceilings, big windows, superb staff and lovely big reclining armchairs for the patients. Most folks are there for infusion (drip) of drugs, for an hour, several hours, or sometimes all day. You chat, read, sleep, get brews and lunch, and you might be in a hotel lounge if it weren't for the dripstands.

Anyway, yesterday, I was getting my belongings together to leave after my four hour session, when a woman sat down in the chair next to where I had been ensconced (that's the right word, the chairs are so comfy. We made the usual polite conversation, is it still cold outside, are you here for long, I'm just leaving, isn't it nice in here, aren't they wonderful, etc etc, when she came out with "And do you mind me asking, what exactly is wrong with you?".

I wanted to say of course I minded, but I was too flummoxed and flabbergasted that I wrapped up my problem in a sentence or so, she came out with some platitude or other, and I got out my phone, went very pointedly out of the door, made the call to my other half to pick me up, went back in, picked up my things and left.

I wish I had been able to tell her to mind her own business. It sounded like she was conducting a survey (she wasn't), and after an acquaintance of a minute or two that question was a bit well... personal. Of course if you are in there and chatting for a few hours, such things often come out in convresation without questions actually having to be asked. I was glad I was leaving - the thought of sitting next to someone like that for a few hours and having perhaps more such questions would have driven me quite mad. That was my tenth session and I have not had anything like it before.

I wonder what any of you would have done in that situation? How would you have reacted? perhaps give me some tips for thinking on my feet in case it happens again? Thanks for listening, anyway...

On a slight side thread, harking back ro a recent thread about Prince Charles saying nurses should have compassion, one conversation yesterday was about something similar. The staff at the unit are unfailingly kind, cheerful, smiling and competent. Their personal skills are second to none. I don't know why they choose to go into oncology nursing rather than or after ward nursing and wonder if a different set of skills is needed, perhaps it will try and ask next time I go. They took part in in our discussion and didn't really mention compassion. My overall impression is one of warmth and humanity - is this the same thing? anyway, I'm very glad they're there - the staff make the whole experience very bearable. I think one thing is that in this situation they have to be very hands on with the patients all the time and so the personal skills side is important.

PS I have no complaints about other NHS staff I have encountered at the hospital, in case you're wondering