[WillowTheWhisp]

I find it quite appalling that people should cast stigmas on adopted children. I have friends who, unable to have natural born children, have adopted three. Their children always knew they were adopted and it was explained to them that they were chosen specially. The fact of their adoption has always been openly discussed amongst friends whenever the subject was valid and so it was never a "discovery" for anyone. In fact we knew before they adopted that they were going through the process. I never think of the children as anything other than theirs and do not see them in any different way.

I can understand what you're saying KiTChener about the desire to have a child and how you would have gone for IVF if it had been available. Maybe not carrying a child to full term would have involved something other than the sort of treatment this woman had. However, you did say that you'd have done it sooner rather than later and I think this is what has shocked most people. This woman was 57 and past the menopause when she began treatment and as Lettie says no doctor in this country would have condoned that.

I know what the desire to have a child feels like because for a long time I didn't think I would have any but then ended up with two, both quite naturally but it did make me older than I would have wanted to be when they were born, unfortunately that was not by choice.

If she doesn't have money who paid for all the treatment and as she is past working age now how is she going to support a child on her own if she doesn't have the wherewithalls? I wonder if we'll hear any more of the story as time goes on.