[yonmon]

Dear Aunt Amy,

I know that you don't receive many letters from elderly gentlemen, but as I am beset by a problem regarding the vagaries of Millinery design, manufacture, and presentation, I write to you hoping that you or one of your colleagues at ' Ladies Gazette' will be able to resolve my problem and afford my troubled mind some respite !.
It is just that recently I have, as opposed to my usual habit of wearing Hats and Caps created in the County style by Charles Trwwhit of Savile Row, been seduced by the popular press into
going out to two football matches wearing what I understood to be rather upmarket wooly cap produced, or so the inside label says, by The Karsten Company in San Diego.
Preening myself in the mirror before venturing forth, This sporting headgear really did in my opinion look quite fetching, but then I am given to excessive narcissism at times and so could have been slightly mistaken !.
But I sallied forth and enjoyed the warmth afforded to my tender ears by the comforting of applied merino wool, and as far as I can remember behaved myself at the game in my usually
urbane and reserved manner, and this is where the story really begins !.
It would appear that my darling little woollen cap was not to everyone's liking, oh no !, for two gentlemen who I like to look on as 'friends', have subjected me to open ridicule just for daring to