[Div3North]

Accrington Stanley

V

Carlisle United FC

2015/16 Prediction League; Game 23 v Carlisle (home)

Carlisle currently lie 5th in League Two, one point and one place above us (37 plays 36, 5th plays 6th, although we have two games in hand); we’ve had two postponed, they’ve had a trip to PNE, with visits to Ewood and the Pleasure Beach still to come ........ does anyone know if the koi carp have been returned home yet, by the way? They’re the leading scorers in the division with 42 in 22 (next highest are Pompey on 39, with Northampton, Luton and Morecambe on 38); they’ve also, though, conceded 37, worse than any of the other teams in the top half of the table; they’ve lost 5 (Pompey have lost 2, Oxford 3 and Stanley 4), they being at BrizzleRov (0-2), Northampton (2-3) and Plymouth (1-4), and at home to Morecambe (2-3) and Newport (0-1) .........either they don’t score, or they lose a 5-goal thriller, it seems........ they’ve scored four twice, and conceded four twice ...... and 79 goals in 22 games gives you 3.59 goals per game; in the League Cup (CapOne) they did Chesterfield – now managed by Danny Wilson – 3-1 at home, QPR (away) 2-1 and lost on pens to Liverpool after a half-Desmond; in the PaintyThingy they lost at Vale Park by the odd goal in one, and in the FA Cup they beat Plymouth 2-0 away, and followed that up by beating Welling 5-0 away, giving them Yeovil at home in Round 3. Six cup games so far; GF13 GA4 ......that means 96 goals in 28 games all told, and 55 scored in all .................Jabo Ibehre (ex Leyton Orient, Walsall, MK Dons and Colchester) has 14 in all competitions; Charlie Wyke (ex Middlesbrough, but all his experience has been out on loan) has 8, and Derek Asamoah (Northampton, Mansfield, Lincoln, Shrewsbury, Lokomotiv Sofia, Pohang Steelers (“What do you do for a living, then?” “Oh, I’m a Pohang Steeler”) and Daegu FC, who I thought made cars) has 7 ..........Pohang Steelers, by the way, are a South Korean side, and they play at the Pohang Steel Yard. Nice ................

So; this week’s starter for 10; the Blues have only had one player sent off this season, in the 30th minute of a 1-1 draw at Wycombe on 24th October.....................Was it (a) Luke Joyce? (b) Luke Joyce? or (c) Luke Joyce? ..............Yes it was!

13 left in the summer, and two more have gone since, both by MutualConsent (they didn’t consent to not playing, I assume); most of the movers (away) and shakers went non-League (Gateshead, Stockport, Shildon, Altrincham, Harrogate, Barrow); some went to do missionary work (Daniel Kearns to Glenavon and David Amoo – ex Liverpool, PNE and Tranmere) to Partick Thistle); one went nowhere; those who stayed in the League were striker Billy Painter (Hartlepool), MF Brad Potts (Blackpool), Kyle Dempsey (Huddersfield for £300,000) and Scottish CF Mark Beck to Yeovil (£undisclosed)

In came six MF players (Connor Hammell through the ranks, Jason Kennedy from Bratfud, Luke “Red Card/Unfinished Business” Joyce, Lincoln’s Tom Miller, Rochdale’s Bastien Hery, and Joe Thompson from Bury); three defenders (Michael Raynes from Mansfield, David Atkinson from Middlesbrough and RB Alexander McQueen – didn’t he design frocks, or something? - from Spurs); LW Angelo Balanta from BrizzleR; RW Kevin Osei from Wassland Beveren (once managed by Bob Peeters, who managed Charlton once – or it may have been twice he picked the team .........); and Jabo Ibehre (see “14 goals in all competitions” above); Osei, by the way, was one of the MutualConsenters, who left on Wednesday just gone .......they also have four on loan, best known being Bury’s ex Everton FW Hallam Hope .................

They joined the League in the old-fashioned way, back in 1928, by getting the second highest number of votes in the annual re-election battle, thus unshipping Durham City from their League status..... their first-ever League game was against us (they beat us 3-2, which was put in the shade by their second-ever League game, when they beat Hartlepool 8-0 – still their highest League victory; in the return fixture at their place they did us again (4-3); their worst-ever defeat was 11-1 by Hull).............in 1949 they appointed one Bill Shankly – a one-time Carlisle player – as Manager (he also managed Workington, it seems, for a while) ..............in1974 they won promotion to the old First Division, and for a few heady days – having won their first three games – they stood astride the Football League.

Famous managers – Shankly apart – include Bob Stokoe (three times), Alan Ashman (twice), Bobby Moncur, Pop Robson and Harry Gregg .........Peter Beardsley played for them, as did Jermaine Beckford, Danny Cadamarteri, Pascal Chimbonda, Ian Harte, and literally hundreds of other people that you’ve never heard of either .............. The Club was formed on 17th May 1904 (it is reported), when Shaddongate United decided, for no apparent reason, to change their name at their AGM to Carlisle United (still took them 24 years to get into the League!); they’ve played at Brunton Park since 1909 (when the water level has allowed, anyway), and their Youth Development Coach is one Vince Overson (Burnley, Birmingham and Stoke); who the kit man is, God only knows!

Last season – their first for some time in the Basement – we won 3-1 at home (Mingoia, Windass and Conneely) but lost 1-0 away; we met in the League Cup and Associate Members’ Cup in the years after promotion back to the League, and we lost twice in 2004/5 in their single-season sojourn in the Conference ...........and of the 55 matches between us over all the years in various Leagues and Divisions we’ve won 18, drawn 8 and lost 29, scoring 92 but conceding 121................our best win was 7-2, but that was, to be fair, in season 1929/30

Deadline for entries is, as always, scheduled kick-off time, which is 3.00pm on Boxing Day; 5th plays 6th (followed by 6th plays 2nd); I’m inclined to agree with JC, that the Christmas fixtures will probably define our season ..............let’s hope the team have stayed off the turkey and the Christmas Pud!

Good luck to everyone! .............. Keep the Faith! .............. A very happy Christmas and New Year to every one of you, and your loved ones! ........And thanks for playing!