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Busman747 · 16-03-2005, 09:11

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife.
It read:
"Dear Wife: You must realize that you are 54 years old, and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight.
Your Husband"

When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows:

"Dear Husband: You, too, are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18.
Don't wait up."

> 2 young boys are in their room... "You know what?" says the first boy, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The other nods his head in approval "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm going to swear first, then you, ok?" "Ok!" they agree with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the first boy what he wants for breakfast. "Oh, **** mum, I guess I'll have some Coco Pops" WHACK!! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out. She looks at the remaining boy and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know," he blubbers, "but it won't be fxxxxxx Coco Pops."

> A duck walks into a pub and says to the barman: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we have no bread." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we haven't got any f*#@ing bread." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, are you deaf, we haven't got any f*#@ing bread, ask me again and I'll nail your f*#@ing beak to the bar you irritating bastard bird!" Duck says: "Got any nails?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread?

16-03-2005, 09:11	#999
Busman747 Always EVIL within us Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Accrington Posts: 1,568 Blog Entries: 4 Liked: 40 times Rep Power: 1670	Re: Joke Of The Day A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read: "Dear Wife: You must realize that you are 54 years old, and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight. Your Husband" When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows: "Dear Husband: You, too, are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Don't wait up." > 2 young boys are in their room... "You know what?" says the first boy, "I think it's about time we started swearing." The other nods his head in approval "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm going to swear first, then you, ok?" "Ok!" they agree with enthusiasm. The mother walks into the kitchen and asks the first boy what he wants for breakfast. "Oh, **** mum, I guess I'll have some Coco Pops" WHACK!! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out. She looks at the remaining boy and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast, young man?" "I don't know," he blubbers, "but it won't be fxxxxxx Coco Pops." > A duck walks into a pub and says to the barman: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we have no bread." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, we haven't got any f#@ing bread." Duck says: "Got any bread?" Barman says: "No, are you deaf, we haven't got any f#@ing bread, ask me again and I'll nail your f#@ing beak to the bar you irritating bastard bird!" Duck says: "Got any nails?" Barman says: "No." Duck says: "Got any bread? __________________ Pray that there is intelligent life somewhere up in space, 'Cause there's Bu""er all down here on Earth - (Eric Idle)*