hi...you will never guess what happened to us last week? you dont know this because your local rag never prints the letters we send and hasnt done for many many years ...
(i could have told you about your dirty daisychaining daughters at least two years ago among other interesting information / new strain aids... incesticide ... primary school prostitutes...
every story the truth nomatter how many cretins find offensive it is still the truth...yet mervyn gay has only printed two out of hundreds over the last five years... i think this whole town sucks inc your paper your council EVERYTHING... the only solution would be to totally destroy the whole county....thats the truth... anyhow mr gay wouldnt print my results i got in
to show you how boring you all are...this is the 4th week and he still hasnt published so he can (d.i.a.)... this is the letter word for word that mr gay wont print... big deal..childrens c
omics have more satire in them...hes a moron.... here goes ....
.
A LIVING TRAGEDY
isnt it funny that whenever there is a living tragedy the answer from the authorities is to simply
change its name and bury their heads again hoping everyone will forget the truth ...e.g...
windscale...grizly rizley...accrington etc.. congratulations hyndburn...you have been voted the
lamest town in lancs, the following should elaborate a little more...
a couple of weeks ago i wrote to you to inform you of the bbc.s findings that the tune "life is good...life is short" from the collective of northern bred musicians known as the unsigned was deemed non racist and stated if anyone wanted to hear it in order to judge for themselves what all the fuss was about, it could be heard on the web. the site was monitored and the results were that in all of the publication area of this paper, just six people could actually be bothered to find out the truth, which goes to show that hyndburn cant be bothered supporting and investing a little time in its own people, resulting in the investor i spent two years gently persuading to pull the plug on this town ,
he said why should he invest in a town full of dead heads? i agree with him too, this is twice in the past 5 years we have been let down by lack of interest or support, it seems the word "patriot" has been destroyed by brussels and yourselves, thanks hyndburn for nothing,you can go back to your soma-coma,s now, theres nothing to see here, there never was,
and dont forget to switch off the light, that is if hyndburn council hasnt sold it yet.....
end of observer letter............................................ ...........yours etc
....that is the truth laydeez and mentlegen .... oh yeah i forgot to mention when some foreign geezer saw the results of this boring town he invited us to do a song at an open air concert somewhere in the world!! ...so off a few of us jetted (gratis) and performed in front of a rather large crowd! .... i was s****ing myself i thought my head was going to burst but we did it! and i managed to include your loverly towns good(barf) name in the lyrics
....this taan is goin daan .... we could only manage to get the audio tapes and will be giving you a taste soon along with a song from the new album called THE HARLEQUINS OF HYNDBURN....which tells the truth of how corrupt this cretinous county really is...
its funny innit 50,000 people who dont know you can get buzzed off your tune but in your own town they are in a social coma of conformity and stupidity... when the accy tune iz reddy ill be in touch ....