[Bazf]

Could well be...but this is a report on Morecambe.

Morecambe.
A place where the only big-name shops are Tesco, Iceland and the ever-present Argos. Take a trip through the Arndale centre (the 'classy' shopping arcade) and you will see all the usual chav hangouts... discount fashion, discount shoes, off licenses and sweet shops for convincing Chardonnay to go to the Post Office accross the road with mum for her giro. On the seafront Morecambe boasts an impressive array of bars offering various chav diversions - karaoke being popular. A Wetherspoons also opened recently, and is already the pub of choice for those wanting a fight.

Out of town, there is a McDonalds (of course!), conveniently sited next to the Heysham Bypass - a long, wide road perfect for burning off those 1.2 litre Nova's and Saxo's with all your similarly gorilla-like mates. Leading off the bypass is the industrial estate where wasteland exists in sufficient volumes for nicked cars to be burnt out by night.

For the upmarket chav, visit Happy Mount Park just before closing time, so you can have an argument with the park warden about kicking you out. Then you may spend your time in the car park at the back in a huge group getting ****ed on White Lightning from the Booze Buster near the station. For a bit of fun bring along the Nova and rev to your hearts content - sometimes the police will come and move you on, giving you the fun of mouthing off to an officer, or showing off your driving skills.