My mum taught me that men are Toss pots....which I think was the best advice.........
She taught me to keep my legs crossed!!! which failed due to the fact that they were crossed over his back
( well if she had explained properly).
She taught me that when you have hang over!! a hair of the dog will always wake you up.
And she has taught me that when you get old..... you can say basically what the hell you like!!! cos no-one likes smacking old people in the teeth for their gobbiness