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Earlier this afternoon I was walking along Blackburn Rd and called in at the newsagents before crossing the road.
Having made my purchase, a packet of bio-degradeable cigarette papers,(don't tell me about being green), I came out of the shop and as I was about to walk the short distance to the curb a taxi pulled up, two wheels on the curb with the bodywork of the vehicle astride two yellow lines that had been painted in the gutter to add a bit of brightness to the area.
Not being as old as I sometimes feel, I was able to jump out of the drivers way, I immediatly walked around the car and placed myself next to the drivers door while waiting for the traffic to clear to allow me a safe crossing.
I was bumped or maybe jogged by the drivers door as he attempted to open it, I stood my ground, he eventually realised there was an obstruction in his way and wound his window down, "excuse me", he said in a dark brown Accrington accent, "I want to get out".
"Well that's tough", I said, "because now you will have to wait for me to get out of your way, if you had waited for me to get out of your way instead of trying to push me off the pavement you wouldn't have this problem, now shut up, stay where you are and wait until I move."

Like a good boy he did as he was told and when the traffic cleared I crossed, after all if he can use the pavement for his convenience I can stand anywhere in the road for mine.