[West Ender]

I didn't go back to work, apart from some "casual" periods, until my youngest child (who is now 31) was 10 years old. My oldest was 22 by then. My husband earned a sufficient salary but we weren't well off and there were no holidays abroad, no 2nd car, no designer clothes and a good deal of D-I-Y on the house - which had a mortgage to pay on it.

I loved being a full time mum but by the time I went back to work, and was able to buy an ancient car because my husband had a company one, the "little one" was almost ready for High School and my husband worked, largely, from home which meant he was usually there when she got in from school. I went back to a job I enjoyed and I was able to provide the "icing on the cake" with what I earned - and buy a slightly newer car. I guess we were very lucky.

I think a lot of women in stable marriages/partnerships, with young children, work to provide that "icing" rather than working for sheer necessity. It's not a case of wanting a husband who can afford to keep them, it's a husband who can keep them supplied with all the trappings that a dual income provides. Our way of life, 30 - 40 years ago, isn't what they want or expect today.