[Bazf]

Keep the seat next to you on the train vacant by smiling and nodding
at people as they walk up the aisle.


Save on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whisky. The following
morning you can create the effects of a hangover by drinking a
thimble full of washing up liquid and banging your head repeatedly on
the wall.

Increase blind people's electricity bills by switching all their
lights on when their guide dog isn't looking.

And my Favorite...........
Manchester United fans. Save money on expensive new kits by simply
strapping a large fake penis to your forehead. It is now clear to all,
as to your allegiance.