[Bazf]

This is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation of a French naval ship with British authorities off the coast of England in October, 1995.

French: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.

British: Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

French: This is the Captain of a French Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.

British: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

French: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER FOCH, THE LARGEST SHIP IN THE FRENCH FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER-MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

British: We are a lighthouse. Your call.