[Perran]

Why do...
Men put the empty milk bottle back in the fridge?

Then you will take it out,wash it and put it outside.

Take the last thing of a plate in fridge and leave the plate there?

Then you will take it out, wash it up and put away.

Sniff their socks when they take them off?

To make sure they are smelly enough for you to find them and put in washing machine quicker thus ending in quick turn around and constant supply of clean socks

Scratch their wotsits first thing in the morning before even opening their eyes?

Hate to state the obvious but a. To check they are still there and b. Because they sometimes itch.

Never replace an empty toilet roll with a new one?

Because your always reorganising and moving the rolls around so we can never find them in the same place twice! ( This can sometimes happen with furniture aswell, with bedrooms becoming studies and dining rooms becoming lounges )

Throw things pathetically at bins and look astounded when they miss?

Who misses?

Use every pan and utensil in the house when they "cook"?

Creates more washing up for you to do. Washing up is relaxing and so gives you time to work out the above answers. Hopefully concluding that by doing the above men can save several vital minutes even hours a week thus giving them more time to spend in the pub or watching footy!