[Rosencrantz]

Britain is a fantastic place to live, this cynicism will surely be one of the greatest things I leave my children. I can't wait until no one takes newspapers seriously any more, so when people like David Davies spell out in clear, concise sentences "there is NO need for this" they can kick in with the see-no-evil-hear-no-evil-speak-no-evil cynicism and just vote for whatever puts the "ragheads" behind bars.

In fact I can't wait until the media starts screaming "despot, despot!" and we all vote for the man wrapped in a flag, carrying a sword of truth and a shield of justice, with the home secretary who will happily sign that 42-day form for the least of political dissenters. I'm sure the people of Accrington will lead the charge in living on our knees rather than dying on our feet, where we'll throw away whatever freedoms we possibly can just to make the blanket a little warmer at night.

Oh wait, no, I suppose I'll understand the undermining of liberty better when I'm older, right guys? Or maybe I just need to leave the comfort of my university and get into the real world where spooooooky Muslim terrorists hide under every desk and we need 42 days to work out whether they're out to kill us or not. Right, right...