[forceten]

I speak from personal experience here. Just over 6 months ago I was told that my Mum would have to go into a nursing home. Previous to that, she had had a heart attack followed by a stroke, and the stroke has left her doubly incontinent, unable to walk, unable to feed herself, unable to talk properly, unable to do anything at all for herself.

She is totally reliant on other people. She also has other medical problems as well. She needs to be hoisted from her bed into a reclining chair. She needs nursing care 24/7.

I didn't want Mum to go into a nursning home, and I offered to have my house adapted, and have nurses in my home for Mum, but I was told that this wasn't possible.

So some people haven't got the choice, the choice is made for them. And it is an upsetting time for them as well.

As for the nail thing, I go up to see my Mum every day, and I always clean her nails for her, and I paint them and give her a manicure as well. If I'm up at mealtimes then I feed her as well. I also change her should the nurses let me, some of them ask me to leave the room, and I do if they ask. If they dont then I help them with Mum.

It's not easy for us, but just because my Mum is in a nursing home because that is what she needs, doesn't mean that I don't love her any less