[West Ender]

Susan Boyle has a good voice, there's no doubt about that, but she's nothing out of the ordinary apart from the way she looks. I am convinced the Americans made a great fuss of her because they thought she was "not quite right"; I think they look on her as a sort of Forrest Gump. I was very glad she didn't win because we have X-Factor for singers and this is supposed to be about Variety. In any case, Susan won't lose out, she will be offered plenty of work. I just hope she gets over her apparent fixation with Piers Morgan and doesn't start stalking him - or worse.

It comes as no surprise to me that the saxophonist has already recorded albums. It's as unsurprising as the fact that Shaheen Whatshisface has appeared on TV and in the theatre several times.

The majority of the finalists were good but not spectacular. I felt very sorry for the little lad who did the body-popping, as Cowell made him cry, but he wasn't a dancer and, to be truthful, he only did what a lot of kids do in the playground, only he did it a bit better. There was no need to be so scathing of him, though, but Cowell wasn't going to make any money out of him, was he? It so contrasted with the way Hollie was treated.

Diversity were exceptionally good, I couldn't fault anything they did, but I doubt they've got much of a future in show-biz. Still, that's not what this contest is about - is it? I still think Stavros Flatley should have won, I laughed until I cried when they did the "Irish" dancing, and it shouldn't matter that they won't be a regular Act. It's just a shame that, in the end, everything comes down to who can make the most money for the promoters.