[Lilly]

Originally Posted by Gayle

How to be a man

1. Talk in jargon, the more complicated the better, ladies love that.
2. Scratch whatever part of you itches, when it itches, there’s no need wait for a moment of privacy.
3. Don’t bother braking slowly when approaching a roundabout, go as fast as you can then see if you can screech the brakes when you get there.
4. In fact, just drive as fast as you can all the time, even if you’re only going 100yards you can still try to reach 60mph
5. Don’t bother indicating, just switch lanes. The woman in the car behind is psychic, she’ll know what you’re about to do.
6. Don’t put the toilet seat down in the middle of the night.
7. Don’t bother with a diary, someone will remind you where you’re supposed to be going closer to the time.
8. Never, ever talk about your feelings to your wife/girlfriend
9. Never, ever talk about your feelings to your best friend either.
10. In need of a support group – go to the football on a Saturday afternoon, there’s 1,000s of men there.

Why, why, why do they do the second one on this list?

If we scratched ourselves like that in front of them they'd be appalled.