[Guinness]

Bah! When was the last time any of you actually saw a 'real nurse' doing any nursing?

Those that do all the 'nursing' jobs like :- looking after patients (soon to be known as customers..I kid you not), changing beds, cleaning up bodily fluids, enemas, shaving, etc..etc..etc.. are not in fact qualified nurses..they are care assistants in all but name, and deserve recognition for their unrewarded work.

'Real nurses' are the ones stood at 'nurse stations' who stare at you, with vacant looks on their face, should you ask anything about the welfare of people on their wards. They are the ones that spout platitudes like 'I don't know which ward he's on now, I wasn't on shift when he moved' or 'I'm training here, I usually work in the <insert greek word here> department'. They are overpaid, underworked and spend most of their time bleating about car parking, unsociable hours and how hard done to they are.

Its these 'real nurses' that will be educated to degree level..and why not..they do beggar all else, they may as well jump on the 'advanced mustard application'(©Eric 2009) bandwagon