[Exile on Spencer St]

Whoever comes in must be over 6 foot' and 12 stone (preferably of muscle not puppy fat).
Should be able to keep goal and then run down the left wing, onto a through ball into open space, behind defences. Ability to pick off rebounds and smash them into the back of the opposing net would also be of benefit.
If he''s someone nephew as well, all the better.