[MargaretR]

The concept of being a virtuous virgin at the altar was a disaster for me.
I spent a two year engagement supressing my physical instincts only to be seriously disappointed when they were (not) 'fulfilled'.

The engagement period was so intensely concentrated on controlling the physical, that the other aspects -ie. whether we were compatible in that and other ways, did not surface for consideration.

As it turned out we were incompatable in both, and eventually mutually agreed on divorce.

If I had defied convention and released that 'supression of urges', I would have realised that we were not suited to spend a lifetime together.