[Busman747]

Originally Posted by Steven

I dont smack my children i never have i never will because of what i believe in.

I think that to "punish" a child by taking away privalidges eg computor or their TV for a week is surley going to impact (parden the pun) them more than a slap or clip around the ear.
Because when my dad used to hit me that was the only real option for him. But now as a parent i beleive i can "punish" my children for misbehaviour better than a clip around the ear hole.

Thank you Steven for returning to the link to explain yourelf. I am sorry that your father meted out punishment in such a way but it helps others to understand your reasoning for not smacking your children. I hope you understand that the vast majority of "smacking" parents do not "give a clip round the ear!" What we are discussing is chastisement for toddlers to help them appreciate the dangers in everyday life.

Previously, I mentioned a German leather belt that my father used to threaten me with, (He used the leather to re-sole his shoes and it got shorter and shorter... ) As a child, he was brought up in a small Welsh mining community and his dad would regularly beat him up after returning from the pits of an evening!! It was so bad, my Dad left home at 14 and made his way to Bedfordshire. He knew the difference between bullying and chastisement and applied it to his family in the best way he knew.

I understand your reasoning when you "deny" access to computers etc as a way of punishing a child but this can work for only a short while as it eventually causes friction between parents and child unless there is a deep-seated "trust" between the three of you. The way forward in my opinion is to show the child at an early age that the parent is right and for the child to respect and listen to the reasoning of parents. THEN you can reason with them and explain in words what is wrong with the actions that they took (or not!)