[Gobsmacked]

Oh come on Willow. You're surely not afraid of the nice Bogeyman are you? I dare you to tell us what you were tempted to say!

With reference to your comments about the closed thread Doug I hope I may be permitted to add a point of view here.

(I own/administrate a couple of message boards where from time to time heated arguments have been known to take place and where the moderators, bless their cotton socks, do a sterling job trying to keep things from getting too much out of hand, so I beg your indulgence here for a moment because I do understand the difficulties you face.)

We had, at one time, a member who spent many hours online in PMs to the ladies of the board and kept them up into the wee small hours chatting because he was an insomniac (or so he told us).

This may well have been very innocent or it may not but the unfortunate outcome was that his wife percieved him spending more time with his virtual "harem" than with her - but unfortunately worse than that it also led to more than one temporary marriage break-up where the women he had been chatting to perceived his flirting and flattery as far more than he intended. One woman confided in me that she had "fallen in love with him" which I told her was preposterous as it is impossible to fall in love with words on a PC monitor. She had actually reached the stage of walking out on her husband and family because of her "on-line relationship" which she saw in an entirely different light than that which was ever intended.

I say this merely to suggest that anything said to members of the opposite sex in private messages needs to be considered carefully. Flirting and fun on the open message board is an entirely different matter where it can be seen by all - it is that which may be perceived to be furtive, or concealed which can lead to problems.

Happily the two ladies concerned are now re-united with their respective husbands and the gentleman has departed, probably for pastures new.