And now over to our embedded reporter somewhere out there in the midst of all the action.........
(reporter to camera man are you sure sweety? Your not just saying that? Now come on, honestly, does my bum look big in this flak jacket?)
(Camera man to reporter, Oh, sh*t you dizzy b*tch we're on air try and act professional!).
Oh, er well, and here we are once more at a secret location somewhere overlooking the whole area of Accrington, you were lucky not to be with us in daylight the heat, the smell, the flies and the seagulls, but now this hilltop vantage point seems to have settled down with just the odd scream from some poor unfortunate G.I.being cornered by the man eating rats here on Whinney Hill,
(
To camera-man, am I allowed to mention Whinney Hill I thought the location was secret?, still never mind I've said it now!).
As I was saying, from here live on November the 5th 2004 at a secret location somewhere above Accrington Looking down on the raging fires and the disturbances with all the American fire power that is going into returning Hyndburn kicking and screaming back to it's former democratic life, because of the isolation of being up here any-one could be mistaken into thinking that this was nothing more than the locals celebrating bonefire-night. I must now return you to the studio.
(To Camera-man I'm telling you now if I have to carry on presenting this in these ridiculously baggy trousers then I quit, they call it a battle dress, you'd think I could at least wear a skirt, fades embarrasingly back to studio............).
or I'll carry on.