Quote:
Originally Posted by tommiasfc
probably drinks alcohol and coffee and takes painkiller and anyone that disagrees is dim
|
Yes, he's a very sad case, he started at an early age when he became addicted to his mothers milk, it took her almost 15 years to wean him away from that habit, (course, she blamed herself having offered it up to him almost immediatly after the cord was cut).
We, his friends tried to help, but we knew nothing and only exacerbated the problem, we tried to control the cravings he had for the evil coffee bean by cutting it with hot water, milk & 3 sugars but he was hooked.
The next thing we knew it was his 18th birthday and he was experimenting with half of mild. This in turn led to him trying the doubles bar where he ended up craving tia marias complete with cherry & paper umbrella.
The hand wrenching, the agony of watching throw himself into the gutter with all the other legal drinkers, (it was even rumoured that he could be seen around town with other like minded weak willed people at what were known as AccyWeb meets), Oh, the shame.
We heard of a rather unconventional cure being put forward by a Professor Horlicks, but later discovered that this charleton was adding extra 'vitamins' to his products thus making, malted milk the inevitable slide back to his original addiction of breast milk.
It was feared that he couldn't be left on his own with any women of child bearing age, without her suffering the indignity of him try to force his way into her blouse!
We have almost given up on him many times, however, he is our friend and we continue to do whatever we can for him hoping that if he can't ever recover his self control, that he will at least have his teeth removed to make the experience less painful to his unfortunate victims.
Hey rindy, where you hiding the instant stuff? After this, I could really do with a quick fix to keep me going until I get to the pub.
