[claytonx]

Two nuns were cycling through some woods when a man jumped out and raped them.
'Oh!'said the first nun.'How are we ever going to explain to Mother Superior that we've been raped twice.'
'But we've only been raped once,'said the second nun.
'I know,'replied the first,'but aren't we going back that way?'

A man walked through the streets of Accrington today wearing only a newspaper. He said he liked to dress with --- The Times.

It was the old missionary in Africa who gave the tribe of cannibals their first taste of Christianity.