Quote:
Originally Posted by DaveinGermany
Eric for your perusal & those who may also be interested, some of Dr. B.Loxs fine works, which I managed to unearth from my vast library of tatty paperbacks, Gentlemans browsing material & back issues of Guns & Ammo. 
In answer to Erics question in post 279, the good Doctor as previously mentioned produced a dissertation on the youth & society of the time (late 90’s) entitled “Saturday night & sheetfaced” & from this we can ascertain various conclusions
Adolescentis Hornius (Randy teen) usually male, will stoop to any lengths to in the vernacular of the period “Cop a feel” or “Get his end away” even resorting to Alcohol, deception & outright lies as a means to this end. Usually found in groups, skulking away doing something illicit awaiting whatever opportunities may arise. There will be a hierarchy within the “gang” but this will be dependent on social status, background & who’s the hardest or the gangs geek.
Slutus Inebriatus (Local Bike) although this appellation is somewhat misrepresentative of the young female in question, she with her friends will no doubt experiment with Alcohol & sexuality in all probably at the same time (or at least that is the conception of A.H) therefore making her fair game, should this not be the case A.H. will have no qualms about trying it on with one of her best mates. (so, from this perspective the epithet Slutus, sits more so with the male as the female of the species)
Should our young mattress matador receive the proverbial swift kick in the nads (either figuratively or eye wateringly for real) apart from being in his own little world of nadular agony, he will simply walk/ hobble back to his mates with empty boasts or proclamations of the denying females sexual orientation. To wit, the comments will run along the typical vein of “No chance there, she’s a proper Lezzer ! And she’s right ugly anyway ! Come on let’s go beat something up !”
Hopefully these chapters taken from Prof. B.Loxs Masters in - I.D.K.S. - N.R.I.D.K.S. - I.R.A.T.B. rather perceptive & timely discourse should help answer some of the questions raised by Mr.Eric of Canada
And what has it to do with the canal of this thread ? I refer you to the unsightly creature “Phallus Coverus” also mentioned by Mr.Eric of Canada oft times found floating in said canal.
Phallus Coverus (Gentlemans Jerkin/Love glove/Salami sling) an inert parasitic creature, lives a secretive life tucked away in a darkened & preferably locked drawer, other locations include crumpled up in the folds of a wallet, or the terrifying recesses & mystical depths of a Handbag. Parasitic in that it requires a host (even better when it’s two hosts) to bring about it’s latent excitability, the life span is very short (minutes if you’re lucky) but extremely intense, after this brief explosive burst of life the Salami sling will slip away into the ignominy of the lavvy/cut/bushes.
(excerpt from “Saturday night & sheetfaced” by Prof B.Loxs blah de blah de blah) |
Finally, we can get back to some serious discussion. What are Professor Loxs views on the metamorphic qualities of slutus inebriatus? It's ability to transform itself from a state of chickus super-hottus to a form known as porcus ditchus in a matter of a few short hours. One of nature's greatest mysteries!
I have been unable to get a hold of "Saturday night & sheetfaced" ... but I do know that Dr. Unken Asshollen (the famous Finnish sociologist and parrot whisperer) holds it in high regard. It is mentioned and quoted in his two papers: "Trashed in Todmorden" and "Plastered in Padiham". I also look forward, as should we all, to his upcoming "Hammered in Hynburn" published by The Railway Clique Press.