When do we know our own mind?
 

Inspired once again by Jambutty in another thread, where he said that at the age of twelve a child should be able to legally say if they want to carry a doner card, and before that age it should be left to parental consent, at what age do we really know are own minds?

This thought really came about because of the case of the twelve year old girl, awarded to the custody of her Mother in the Western Isles of Scotland, but according to reports she herself would rather live with her Father in Pakistan, where she is now residing.

Some young people do know what path they want to take in life, and accept the consequences that may follow. Others might need help and support, and are totally unable to decide what they should be doing, but then again that could apply to people of all ages.

So at what age did you know your own mind?

I was seventeen. I finally stopped lieing about who I was, and have followed my own path, rightly or wrongly, since that day in June 1982.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Good question, I will have to ask Rhonda in the morning before i can answer.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Do you ever know what you really want though, and if you do, do we ever get it. I've just drifted through my life, others run it, work, parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, friends wanting favours. I haven't got children so They don't run my life for me, but I know they do if you have them, be in to take them to school be back to collect.

In answer to your question I think you start to know your own mind when you take on responsibilty for yourself. Up until then you just think you know your own mind.

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Don't worry, she already told me. she plans to let you have it for your fortieth birthday.


Ooopsie, there goes your suprise!:D

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A long wait still then ;)

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Some folk may have harder choices to make than others.

I presume, maybe wrongly, that a twelve year old would look to the parent who she feels more comfortable with or within mixed marriages the culture she prefers.

A level students with their parents behind them can choose which uni they prefer but at the other end of the scale other teenagers have to decide whether they work at Burgerking or Mcdonalds. If they can get a job, that is.

I was sort of middle of the road. My first job was at the Social Security Office in Melbourne St, having left Rhyddings at sixteen with an average education. Some of my choices in life have left me with a sour taste but on the whole, it hasn't been too bad. I really regret early retirement though x

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

If a child of 10 can be held legally resposible for breaking the law then from the age of ten they should know their own mind. Kids grow up rapid today and are a lot wiser and world savvy than a generation ago.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

I agree Junetta, it is a bit of a lottery about the level of support some children get from their parents, and its not always the parents fault.


I'm in two minds about the young girl Molly Campbell/Misbah Rana. Legally she should be in Britain, and hopefully the courts would have listened to whichever parent/culture she wished to live with. Seeing her on the news she did however seem a young lady who did know her own mind.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

in all honesty

my mid/early 20's

b4 that i was just so indicisive i didnt know if i was coming or goin thsi or that

the thing that i reckon really settled me down and got me thinkin was becomin a father...

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After sleeping on it I am not sure if I still know my own mind yet. :o

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

You'd probably feel more refreshed if you'd slept on a mattress instead.:D

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

:mad: ..........Double post.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Leaving home forced me to start knowing my own mind, I didn't have anyone elses mind to use.
A descision I truely regret, Since then I feel that I've lost everybody that counted with one exception, my uncle/adoptive brother.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Sometimes think children decide to know their own mind a lot younger than they should! :rolleyes:

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

I was taking responsibility for my younger brothers from about the age of 10.....I have been very sure about the direction I wanted to take in my life....and on the whole I would say I have done well. If I could go back there are not many things I would change.....there are some things in other peoples lives that I would change if I could....but that's not possible.

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I think I was about 16/17 when I made that huge decision and realised that I knew my own mind.......... but with hindsight I really shouldn't have bought that powder blue Bowie suit after all.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

:engsmil: I know my own mind so if you don't mind i'd like to donate my well
used liver and kidneys to,- a poor down-trodden minority, as these poor souls cant usually get a matching one, I can assure anyone that gets them, there is at least a good days wear in them. Chin Chin. Grumpy Ian.
:D :D :D :D :D :D .

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

2 minutes back and some imature tit tells me to stop feeling sorry for myself with negative. well good knews for ya, my life is going quite rosey since i made that past and i'd bet considerably better than your sad existence. I've made lots of new friends recently, I've been invited to a pub opening over nottingham, I've been invited out by another girls more local and i'm chating to a girl up accy way :)
I've stopped feeling sorry for myself. if any other girls would like to get to know me form an orderly que. :D

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I think I would to willow, it's got me no where being kind generous and considerate.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Still don't know me own mind ... do lots of U-turns and humming and aying. Although have had to make my own important decisions over the last 20 years, usually left it to Lady Luck by tossing a coin. :confused:

Think next time need a decision will ask you lot .. you always good for an opinion .. :D Actually, joking apart know you would help xx

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

I look at some people who are in their early twenties and I can't help but admire how driven they are with career goals and their direction in life, they have such a confidence that they will achieve it all.

As for me, I think different things hit me a different points in my life - for instance, music and clothes - from the age of about 13 I've always known my own mind and have never followed my friends 'fashions' - but in other things it was much, much later.

With relationships, I don't think I knew what I wanted until I was in my mid twenties - the defining moment was when an ex-boyfriend was dithering about me and I gave him a twenty four hour deadline, he said I couldn't do that and I told him I could do what the hell I wanted. It made me realise that I was in control of the relationship - he turned up by the way!

As for career, I don't think I'd got that worked out until about five years ago. I'm the happiest I've ever been in my working life - have some stability and some flexibility, I can choose projects that I want to work on and have freedom to do it.

I would say that I totally know my own mind now, I know how I'll react in certain situations, I know what I want from life but I don't plan too much so that I can adapt to new things. So, in short (after that very long winded answer) I'll say that I first realised that I knew my own mind at about 30 to 35ish.

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Mmmmm good ponder, truelly i haven't appreciated nor known my own mind till i was 23 when previously thinking i knew my own mind totally backfired & found out the hard way i actually didnt & it was under a lot of influence of other people not me - so i soon took charge & responsibility of my own mind.

Children may think they know their own mind but are not maturely equipped to deal with it as that side isn't fully developed till at least after the age of 22 lol, altho the confusion is feelings versus mind is the harder to accertain.

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

Well Willow, the things that I would change would come into the category of selfish....but they involve how other people conduct their lives....and it isn't possible is it? I left school without any qualifications........and there weren't the same opportunities then to further yourself if you went to what was then called a 'Secondary Modern' School.....no opportunities to do GCE's......you were essentially 'factory fodder'.
I did however, get my chance to do Nurse Training and I was determined to be the best I could be. I also went on to do an Adult Teaching course...which I loved. I really wanted to go back and see some of the teachers who thought they were teaching no hopers....just to let them see I had made something of myself. I made my niche......and I still have people coming up to me and saying 'Sister P....how are you doing?'

I'm doing fine!

Re: When do we know our own mind?
 

I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.:)