grooming
 

Why is it that some women fall so easily to grooming? Is it that the chance that the grass may be greener on the other side of fence?
Why is it that us blokes feel the need to groom someone else’s wife or girl friend?
I’ve been there, done it myself, also had it done to me. At the end of the day there is no difference. But why?
Anyone any ideas?

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Ya, Its weird isn’t it. I suppose that it is quite normal in life.
I believe my x-girl friend did a runner through being groomed. You know, one goes to work 5days a week and you like to think that your partner is safe.
I don’t really know how it happened but it did. I maybe totally wrong, it could have been the other way about it could have been her doing the grooming. It is difficult at the beginning not to point a finger. At the end of the day you do get over it and things do work out ok in the end.
Funny what us humans do. lol

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How true, although while having a shindig and enjoying the company of friendship.
People should in the back of their mind be considering the feelings of the other person’s partner. I cant think of anything worse than having some other cowboy trying to hustle in on my woman I would have to shoot him.

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Well some of you know what it means but I don't. Whats grooming ? Obviously not what I thought.

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So.. usual imature response then :( No I wasnt thinking of horses... Reading the first post by Len I thought it had summat to do with making oneself look good and maybe women trying to make there menfolk better...

Anyone else care to explain?

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The pure fact that I asked it to be explained should have made it clear I am missing the point... I cant see anywhere its dircted at you... However now you say it and I re- read do i presume you ahve chatted up someone elses missus?

And from your response do i take it you do it a lot?

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Well this is a public forum so we are all involved now.. its gone global! :)

Cards on table then. stop pussyfooting abut.. Do you chat up other peoples partners? You know that doesn't mean forming friendships.. Do you chat them up with the possibility of wooing them away from there men. Is a little relationship other than friendship in the back of your mind?

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Its a forum not a court thus making your second part of the questin null.... don't be such a drama queen doug :)

wasn't ? Does that mean wasn't but is now?

Only asking cus I am nosey and as this is a public forum and I am just joining in the subject...Thats my choice just as it is yours :)

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Well I’ve started something here.

When I started this thread I was thinking of myself.
I went out last night and saw one of my mates girl friend being hit on by another bloke the sad thing was that my mate was sat with them and you could tell he wasn’t very happy about it. Then of coarse my own mind went into over drive and I started thinking about my past situation.
Anyhow I came home had a quick look on here and low and behold in my mind at that time it was going on here too. I was feeling a bit sorry for myself like you do when you’ve had a bell full of beer. Lol
So I thought I will ask the question. Why do we do it? I suppose that there isn’t really an answer, we just do.
This thread isn’t about any one particular person. It’s about everyone.

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I am confused ???

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Referring to your mate in the pub.
I find it hard to understand how a person can blatantly gallivant with some other bloke’s woman under the bloke very nose. He will be sending her text messages next. Complete disrespect.

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Where on earth Does it say that this thread is aimed at you Doug????????
Len is a long standing member on accyweb and has never acussed or even attempted to wind up anybody!!!! Surely not everything discussed on here is about YOU.. i've lost count of the amount of threads where YOU have brought up the subject of your flirting!!!!!!!!! :mad: .

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Ok Doug.

Well thats news to me.

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Your right, it doesn't. Maybe I'm too wrapped up in my own importance. If that the case then I apologise for my arrogance.

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Simon.. when confused... Ask.. thats what I did. :)

I agree with Shane re the original post.. You can't get much lower than chatting a blokes missus up right under his nose ...seriously.

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Now I know its context... I have to say I dont like the word "grooming". Just doesn't seem right.... Whats wrong with the goold old phrase "Chatting up" ?

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The smoke is clearing..................

The term grooming is stupid it does not convey the real meaning.....

If someone is chatting up your women make it CLEAR that it is not welcome... Then if he/she persist's Kick there head in simple.........There is a line not to cross and if you cross it you may get hurt..Old fashioned maybe...But true.

Although if the woman being chatted up does not make it clear then.....??? Or maybe she is just being NICE and does not want to offend ???

Nasty buisness ...:(

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Doug I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST POSTED THAT. TALK ABOUT TWO FACED!

What happened to your quest for free speech.. OK when its insults and horrible words pointed at other people (including at school kids) but when its directed at you free speech goes out the window...... hahaha

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Simon..it was the word grooming that threw me at first.. Use the term chat up.. it gets straight to the point :)

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I agree with ya there simon!!! sometimes its the only way.
I know of people who have been threatened with death for seeing another mans wife!!! And the bloke doing the threatening was a copper!! :D

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Come on.. You can see my point surely ? :)

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So what was said in the chatroom then????? and by who????

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good point Wingy....... If its out in open lets know it all :)

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I think grooming was the correct word, (I’m no expert of coarse) because I ‘m sure that anyone who has lost there partner to some one else will probably know that it went on for weeks/months even years so you cant really say that they where chatted up. They must have been seeing, wooing, having an affair etc in that period. None of which would have made a good title for a thread.

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I'm with you on that Len.
I ain't heard it called Grooming before but i think its a good word IMHO :D

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It was the nastiest, most fitting word I could think of because when something like this happens to a person you feel like being nasty. (Short term hopefully) lol
I hadn’t realized that no one had ever heard of it.

And no one yet has come up with any answers .

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Whichever word you use, the original post seemed to infer that you think the person involved is either gullible, hasn't got a mind of their own or can easily be led - does it not?

Using the word "grooming" makes it sound even worse!

As adults we are all responsible for our own actions I thought.
:confused:

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Good point.
But I did say some women, not all. I was only really thinking of one. I suppose one does tend to think the worst of the whole situation. I would not be surprised if she had not even been groomed at all maybe she just got sick of the sight of me and decided to legged it. lol

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I thought grooming only referred to an adult who chatted up a young person on the internet in a way which miseld them into thinking they were talking with another young person until they totally trusted them enough to agree to meet them in real life. Children can be more easily misled than an adult and more trusting.

When it comes to flirting between two adults it depends where the line is drawn. If someone worked for a long time at leading someone away from their spouse it goes deeper than just flirting. It almost sounds as if the woman had no control over what happened.

Sadly relationships don't always last and people do move on. When you are the one left behind it must hurt.

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Thats it... thats where I have seen the term grooming... thats why it sounds so offensve..good find willow

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I've just had a look in Word Web.

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Wow thats up to date...Not :)

Now try netalert.net

http://www.netalert.net.au/01031-Wha...e-Grooming.asp

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Well I can assure everyone that my X was way way past being a child. lol :o

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hehehehehe thats good to hear :) But we where reffering to the choice of words.. Not really an important issue.. just a side issue if you will :)

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Well your mates fault there.He should ask the other guy to leave and if he does not do it under his own steam then he gets helped.End of story.

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Wish I could answer your question Len, but to be honest I really don't know why people do it. I have never responded to grooming, but mild flirtation can be fun as long as it's just taken as flattery and nothing more comes of it. I am a totally useless flirt, have never been good at it really. My best mate is a brilliant flirt and uses her talents to get what she wants eg. discounts in shops, good service in bars and restaurants etc. She has never had a long term flirtation which involvers her running off with another fella though.
I do know someone who ran off with another fella, and her excuse after 25 years of being married was that she was simply bored and looking for a bit of excitement. All I can say is that the grass is never greener on the other side, and this kind of thing has happened to plenty of us. Wish I could give you an answer, but it stumps me does this one. :confused:

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The menfolk will be queing up to teach you how to flirt on saturday after that post hehe :)

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:rofl38: I could do with the lessons Kipax, but have a feeling that their time and effort would be wasted. Old dogs, new tricks and all that.. :D

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Ya, I figured it was going to be a difficult one, How does one explain human behaviour it probably still baffles the experts.

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But fun :)

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Flirting:
I’m not very good at it but I have had my moments usually between 6 and 7 pints.
When I’m with friends I usually know when to back of a bit especially when I’m been glared at.

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Flirting is part of everyday life - babies actually flirt with adults to get what they want - no one has ever taught them how. So long as it's just a bit of fun it's quite harmless and a bit of a confidence boast.

On the other hand if you felt your partner was being chatted up in front of you - you would feel threatened and it would be natural to be defense.

Why we do it is down to our nature - humans have moved on alot in a short space of time but our brains haven't developed as quickly and our animal instincts are still with us!!!

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You could equally well ask why we feel flattered by someone's attention instead of immediately wondering what they are after.