Advice Please ???
 

Hi all just wanted to bend your ears lol but most of all if im well out of order on this pls pls tell me !!! here we go ...............

Me and my Hubby have decided to get our house re valued, then depending on wot its worth will put it up for sale, however after sharing this with a few of my other mates and they just say well its up 2 you wot you do ect...... but one particular freind is'nt best plzed i dnt think ?? you see she has decided to send her son to the same school as my middle and my youngest son, how ever as she doesnt drive, she will struggle to pick him up as its a fair way, so i kinda said well i cud pick him up as im going there any way to get my 2 boys, this was talked about lat yr !! any way as ive spoke and mentioned about if we do move, depending on the area then the above plans will change esp if i move to lower darwen it would prob take over half an hour of two-ing and fro-wing !!! esp with the traffic up there !! then the nxt idea is she came up with was her hubby take them all to school and i drop them off at home time ??? but the distance is way too far. why cant she see this ???? if feel so tight on her but wot else can i do ??? :(

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I don't think you are out of order, things change and if you move she can't expect you to go miles out of your way to solve her problem!!

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thanx harwood red xx its realy started too do my nut in #! its like i havnt even rung the estate agent yet as im kinda putting it off !!! i might just mention too her too ava look at another school near bye just in case i cnt do it ??

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I dont think its your problem and I certainly wouldn't consider not moving because of it, if she had anything about her she would tell you not to worry about it and she'll arrange something else.

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Are you moving to Lower Darwen by choice :rolleyes:

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not too sure yet
i want it to be with in driving distance of the school

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Why should you make yourself responsible for what is, after all, her child?
No, don't give it a second thought.......you should do what you want to do.....she will have to sort out the transport for her child herself.

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Spot on!

Also what would she do if her child were ill and had to be collected straight away? Would you have to go and get him? Or if your children were ill and didn't go in are you expected to abandon them to take her son to school?

She is being unreasonable, she is responsible for him and to expect you to commit long-term to an arrangement like that is unfair (remember children go to school for at least 12 years!)

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Emma, being one of the ones who has said do what is right for you john and the kids(even though i'll miss one of my best mates) just ignore the silly cow, you dont owe her anything.


what Emma hasnt told you lot is that this 'friend' of hers tries to live Emma's life, she has her hair cut just like Emma, she bought her house cos Emma bought hers, she even got a dog because Emma got one, Emma has 3 children so this 'friend' wanted 3 children too....she just wants to be her and its kinda freaky


EMMA JUST DO WHAT YOU WANNA DO and ignore the stupid cow :D

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That sounds like stalking to me -- move out of daily travelling distance ---and dont tell her your new address

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lol your soooooooooo right margaret

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yer most important priority is YOU n yer FAMILY, its that simple,dont let this selfish brainless cow put you on a guilt trip, the guilt is hers.;)

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i agree with every one here

its up to her how she picks up her child
youve been doing her a favour for the past few months

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It sounds to me like this woman is not a friend. A ture friend would be more than happy for you to do what is right for you and your family, even if you were moving to the other side of the world..
Ignore her and do what is best for you and yours..:)

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looks like to me she only wants ya for ya car , so tell her to **** off, if she dont like it then take em to another school!

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wow !! lol thanx a lot guys xx ive even spoke to her today and is saying stuff like we will have to get a spair booster seat ? i said wot for ? for september when kids go to school !
i said i hope to have moved by then lol i then said that i dnt expect **** ( her hubby ) to drive all the way to pick up my sons( were ever i move ) then drive them to school, then expect me to do the same at home time ???? i realy think she has lost the plot !!!

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I agree with everyone else who has posted here. Tell her that you won't be responsible for taking her children to school, if she can't get them there then she needs to send them to one that she can get to.

What Flashy said about your mate is scary, it sounds like she'll be wanting to drink your bath water next! :eek:

Move house and 'lose' her phone number. :)

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Its her problem to get her child to school. If you went on holiday 1 week before the holidays would her child her not go to school for that week? You cant be held responsible for her child getting to school she is. She is also responsible for picking her child up. Also it sounds like your children are older than her child - your children are already at that school - so what happens if you dont move and you stay were you are does she expect you to take and pick up her child even after theyve left that school? I would tell her to find her own way to and from school that she cant depend on you being there.

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if what flashy says is right "bunny boiler alert" start sounding here. move don't say when or where and leave falsh phone number (382*** local police station)

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People are here to live their own lives, and if on the way you can give some one a leg up all well and good, but when that some one expects you to do things just to sort out their problems, its time to tell them to sod of.

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Yep it is all true she's a bit ahem.....strange......always living what other people do......Emm do what you want to do ..don't even for a second think about her!...You've go what she wants and unfortunatley....she aint gonna get it :D xxx

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had an accywebber at my house yesterday when this woman dawn and em are on about came round and he said 'she's too happy for my liking, whats she on?' lol

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my eldest is in his last yr then my middle one is a yr 1 and my youngest one starts in sep the same has her son, and her eldest is alredy at high school. My hubby said to me it was a bit much of a commitmant b4 we decided to move, like above said, if mine were off with illness or we were on holiday how would she cope then ?? and i said this too here last year she just said "we'll coss that when it happens ?? you see she hasnt drove a car for over 10yrs !! so she will just have to book a refresher course, and get behind the wheel, even though she says to me she hates drinving. when i told all this last week to another freind of mine ( who has never even met her !!) she said the same as everyone on here she just cnt expect me to commit to this and any one normal would surley understand ?? I could do with speaking to her hubby on his own without her being there to se what his veiws are ???
sorry for going on and on, but it has realy got to me :confused:

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DO YOU WANT A SLAP MRS w? just ignore her, she's a div ;)

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Oi Mrs Howarth 2 slaps on way ( Flashy and me ) u are an independent great person.......she is not that is the prob! LEAVE HER!

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Can't help but think that this 'kids' thing is but her lame excuse for wanting to be 'close' to you- kinda possesive.The schooling issue may well be nothing but a smokescreen for her more emotional feelings. Get her out of your life.

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If you didn't want to move your klds and upset their schooling, didn't want then to lose class mates friends, then it could be quite convenient. By what you've said though, thats not an issue, so I'd just start them in a new school. Tell her you've become an environmentalist and couldn't possibly allow them to be driven to school over that distance. Then use the same excuse so you don't have to go n see her.

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from what i know they are staying at the same school, it would be just too much for em to have to pick the other child up too

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you're having a laugh right? tell her to get lost.

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jay this other woman is verrrrrrrrryyyyyyy strange, even stranger than you mate ;) lol

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cheeky sod, I'm eccentric, not strange.

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No I will be keeping my youngest two there even if i move to Lower darwen, as the distance either way is about the same with the moto way being accesable :)

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Since several of us regard this woman's behaviour as strange and abnormal, I have delved into webpages to see if there is a 'mental illness' name for it.
It seems to be described as attachment behaviour-

Affectional bonds are formed as a result of interactions with the attachment figure, that is to say, between child and parent. Emotional life is seen as dependent on the formation, maintenance, disruption or renewal of attachment relationships. Consequently, the psychology and psychopathology of emotion is deemed to be largely the psychology and psychopathology of affectional bonds.

Psychopathology is regarded as due to a person having suffered or still be suffering the consequences of disturbed patterns of attachment, leading the person to have followed a deviant pathway of development. Infancy, childhood and adolescence are seen as sensitive periods during which attachment behaviour develops -normally or deviously- according to the experience the individual has with his attachment figures.

Finally, loss or threat of loss of the attachment figure is seen as the principal pathogenic agent in the development of psychopathology.


It sounds very dodgy to me, and I would be most uncomfortable with the type of 'friendship' she claims to have with you, be careful how you end it, but end it you must.

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You needed to check up if a woman behaves strange and abnormally ? Should have just asked one of us blokes :p:D

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Men rarely grow up - so for men - that is normal

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lol :p xx thanx two all of you again, i mite get some peace from her as shes going away in her caravan at wkend lol :p