abortions?

MUMMIBOO said:
Well what a difficult thread and post to make!

I went for my first scan on Thursday i was 11 weeks pregnant with 3rd baby wanted very much we had been trying since December we managed to get pregnant in September we were soo excited,

Like i said i went for my first scan on Thursday only to be told that my baby was the size of a 9 week old and that its heart had stopped beating at around 9 weeks. I didnt have a clue i had no pain and no bleeding i couldnt believe what she was saying to me i had a picture from the scan and it looks perfect soo cute.

The midwife said my bodys not accepting i have lost the baby and is still feeding it thats why i still feel pregnant! I have been told to give it till Thursaday and see if my body rejects it on its own if not then medical intervention will be needed same thing as what happends when you have an abortion!.

I just cant see at the moment how people can just kill or get rid of children or the makings of them when there are people around who are trying and trying for children all the people who cant have them i know its not their problem but i just think for the right reasons then fair enough but just for the sake of it is wrong.
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MummiBoo I really do know what you are going through. I was 13 weeks pregnant when I went for my scan and they told me my baby had died at 8 weeks. I broke my heart for month's - I say month's because when I held my last born son!! ( I already had 1 perfect boy)- In a way I reasoned with the fact I lost that baby to get this perfect baby boy. I would never have had him if I had given birth to the baby I lost, because I only wanted 2 babies...... I have my 2 perfect boys now......god bless my baby I lost, but on lives my boy that I did have the fortune to have.

But I too don't agree with abortion......and 2 weeks after I miscarried the baby I sooooo wanted....someone had a abortion because she had a HOLIDAY ROMANCE one night stand and ended up pregnant.......and got rid.:mad::mad::mad:
 
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Sorry mummiboo and ((((((((hugs)))))))) from me too.

What do i think about abortion - i've never been pregnant so i've never been in that position. Im against it as a way of contraception as some women do use it like that. It depends on why you are having the abortion. I know what i've been told from my consultants about having a baby. If i ever got pregnant i would be under the care of my neurologist, gp, midwife and epilepsy nurse. But also if i did want a child that it would have to be planned and not a mistake because of the drugs i take could harm the child. By the time i would know that i was pregnant the drugs will already have harmed the child and so the problem would be do i have an abortion or risk it and have the child.
 
AWWWWWW mummyboo..big hugs to you hun and very couragous for having to go through such a thing , I once had a friend that carried hers full term only to go through similar ...



As for my fellings on abortion ..well.... IMHO it all depends on the circumstances and there really are so many..

A... If rape and a girl/woman dosent feel comfortable carrying that child ..YES
B... If a youngster through ignorance and stupidity that dosnt want it ...then no, adoption should be only alternative to give the unfortunate childless couples out there a chance .
C.. If a woman that is continually getting children taken off her through NEGLECT then IB sterilization is the answer.
AND D... I dont personally agree with them unless it is a proven medical thing that effects a childs future apart from A..
 
if abortions are made illigal it will just revert to the old days when pregnant women ended up on a strangers kitchen table for a few quid which often ended up with the mother and child dying

each person is entitled to their own decision and no one has teh right to pressure anyone aginst what they choose because they dont like it

abortion should not be used as contreception i agree but quite frankly what another person decides to do is none of my buisness

gets real tricky when a woman wants an abortion and the father dosnt though donst it , if i remeber right a man took his partner to court because he wanted the baby she wanted to terminate and if i also remeber corretly again he lost and the baby was terminated , slightly off topic but somat else to think about :)
 
Awwww... I'm so sorry Mummiboo. It must be a hard time for you right now, and so brave of you to answer this thread. My thoughts are with you.

I personally wouldn't use termination of pregnancy as a form of contraception but there is a place for it in cases of rape and foetal abnormalities which are incompatible with life (the medical term for disabilities so severe that the baby would be stillborn or die shortly after birth). There is also a place for termination with foetal abnormality which would severely compromise a family's quality of life. The decision to terminate is often a very difficult one, bear in mind that most women bond with their babies almost as soon as they find themselves pregnant. In cases of foetal abnormality, it is often a huge shock and a gut wrenching decision.

I don't believe that it is on anyone's agenda to ever have a termination. If you ask a little girl what she wants to do when she grows up, she will never say 'have a termination'.......

The reason that medical staff use the term 'abortion' for what we know as a miscarriage is because that it is (and always has been) the correct medical term. Unfortunately the word abortion has been misused by lay people to mean the deliberate ending of a pregnancy and it has stuck. Therefore, when medical and nursing staff use the term 'missed abortion', women who have miscarried may find it upsetting. The staff are not being insensitive, they are using the correct medical term. A deliberate ending of a pregnancy is know as a termination... I hope this explains some of the terminology, as legally, the correct wording has to be used in medical records in order to avoid confusion.
 
Big hugs to you mummiboo and to your family, my thoughts are with you all xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

For me I couldn't terminate a baby, but I don't believe it is my right to judge others (except those who do use it as a contraception!!!!)

I think every case is unique
 
mummiboo, that is so sad. I too have lost a baby in the past, know what you are going through and my thoughts are with you.

Chrissie xxx
 
I think it should be legal, and that the choice is there for people to decide for themselves. I notedly said people, rather than woman's choice, as I think both parents should have a say in the decision.

It does make me angry when people use terminations as birth control. Anyone can make a mistake, but when you get to above three abortions that is just stupidity.
 
The choice needs to be there for all the reasons stated above except to be used as a way odf disposing of an unwanted baby that is the result of simple carelessness. As has been mentioned,the morning after pill is now readily available.
Mummiboo;you have my best wishes,had the same situation myself in 2002 and it's very difficult to get the elation of pregnancy out of your head when you are told it's not going to happen.Don't give up.x
 
It's a very emotive subject isn't it?

For me, in most cases, it's wrong. When a foetus is healthy I can see little justification in killing it, even in cases of rape. I know it's traumatic for the victim of a rape but it's rather more than traumatic for the innocent baby - and I can't reconcile the difference between a wanted baby and an unwanted foetus, the terminology changes depending on the circumstances, doesn't it?

A young woman I know had to have a termination of her first baby because scans revealed it had not developed a brain. She was devastated but it was the right thing to do because the child could not have survived and to go to full term would only have prolonged the agony.

I know another woman who had a termination because the baby was "inconvenient". I'm sorry to offend some of you but I couldn't see how that was different to murdering a new-born because it's in the way.

My own youngest child was "inconvenient". I had a 12 year old and a 10 year old when I became pregnant with her and I had just gone back to my Civil Service career. At that time, 1975, it was very difficult to be the working mother of a very small child and I really didn't want 3 children. I went through a couple of weeks of despair and I did think about termination, briefly, then I realised that this was as much my child, and my husband's, as the other 2 were and it wasn't just a collection of cells, it was a baby. Well - it's just had its 31st birthday. It's a warm, loving young woman that drives me mad at times but without whom the world would be a poorer place and it's the mother of my beautiful granddaughter.

Incidentally - I was an "accident" too. :)
 
Hey Mummiboo, my heart truly breaks for you, your husband (Daddyboo) as well as for your Mum and Dad.

For all those who have shared their thoughts, pains, confusions, frustrations, anger, etc., over the issue of abortion, I appreciate your comments and feelings. It such a difficult issue to be either 100% one way or the other eh?

I've lost 4 either nieces or nephews on Cindy's side to abortions. All were a convenient method to dispose of and be done with "a mistake." When Cindy's 16 year old sister became pregnant (for the first time), it was Cindy being 18 who signed the approval form. They felt it best to keep it from the parents. The father of the baby, a good friend of mine, wanted to keep the baby. They were all Catholics which also made the decision hard.

I know the pain and anguish this has cause my very kind wife still haunts her. Her sister on the other hand went on to O.D. on LSD and had a couple more "convenient disposals."

If I may go on . . ., my little sister, in Alabama, 8 and 1/2 months pregnant, "felt" something was wrong a week or 2 before her due date. The doctors told her the baby had died. For some horrendous reason, they were not able to schedule her delivery for a few days later. The anguish of having to carry this little baby, then she had to be induced and go through the "normal" delivery process. Instead of the joy of hearing the baby's first cry, mere silence. They had a nice funeral for Kayla Dawn L., which my older sister and I were able to get down to attend. "Too far" for my parents or brothers to attend but that's a whole other issue eh?

For all you Moms, Sisters, Aunts, I salute your strength in the face of such trials and tribulations as mentioned in this thread.

As for my answer on the abortion issue. I believe life begins at conception. I believe abortions are too laisez-faire for many of these young girls. I believe that abortions for "convenience" cause many emotional problems that are rarely discussed. I believe that aortions after the first trimester should be illegal except for the health of the mother.

Finally . . . yes finally, I believe anyone who has had, or will have, an abortion, should not be judged or condemned but rather loved and comforted. Because in my opinion (with "convenient" abortions) "they know not what they do!"

Brian
 
garinda said:
I think it should be legal, and that the choice is there for people to decide for themselves. I notedly said people, rather than woman's choice, as I think both parents should have a say in the decision.

It does make me angry when people use terminations as birth control. Anyone can make a mistake, but when you get to above three abortions that is just stupidity.
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This is exactly what I think. At the end of the day it is up to the individual (or couple if that may be the case) If it is legal or not, it is always going to happen. I personally think is should be legal for the simple fact that if it wasnt, there would just be butchers doing it illegally.

My thoughts are with you and your family Mummiboo. xxxxxx
 
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