Another update...

dotti34

Nori Brick
Tackler
I thought I’d write an update as to how things are here at present. I have to say that you Lancashire lads certainly have what it takes, that is if my L.L. is anything to go by. He is proving to be an inspiration to us all in a situation that none of us want to be in but unfortunately so many are.

He continues to think positively and while we talk openly about what fate has decided for him he will not let us dwell on it. We are not stupid and we know what the inevitable will be (no cure or treatment for his cancer, no stopping it in its tracks, no erasing it, and definitely not expecting miracles) but until that time comes his attitude is ‘up yours, mate’.

Every day is precious and he is doing all he can to keep on keeping on. Having lost 15 kgs in a reasonably short time this has now been halted and he is in fact putting a little bit back on. Although he lost his appetite there for a while this is now back to normal and he is eating well. He was determined to do so.

A cough that can be quite nasty worries him at times but he takes it all in his stride. Says it's par for the course.

We have been enjoying different events as they come and go. Planning for something in 10 years time would be extremely unrealistic and a waste of time – which is something we can’t afford to do (waste time) so we just look forward to the next thing coming along.

Since he was diagnosed we have had a good Christmas, another anniversary (61 years now but who’s counting), a quiet but happy Easter, my birthday (and I’ve had a LOT of those, too many to think about), as well as family birthdays. His is coming up in July so that is the next ‘event’. My oldest daughter says that Christmas is at their place this year and as his nibs loves their Ponderosa (as he calls it) he is aiming to be there. She says he has to be. I hope he is.

Has taken up reading again and rediscovered the joy of books. Having walked many miles in the Lake District when he was a lad (and it remains his favourite place) he is presently reading books by Alfred Wainwright about the Fell walks that A.W. did. I am continually purchasing new books by this man so that my bloke will have to stay around if only to read them and finish them all. I’ve told him I’m thinking of buying War and Peace – that’s a heck-of-a-long volume for him to read and will keep him here for a while to come.

When family and friends visit we share plenty of laughs - no doom and gloom allowed, though we speak openly about everything. We certainly don’t hide our heads in the sand. We also manage to retain a sense of humour.

Unfortunately he’s not able to do anything that requires any effort as he soon gets out of steam but that’s okay, nothing to do anyway.

That is the situation at present. He is not feeling sorry for himself (he said he would be if he was 43 and not 83) and so none of us are allowed to feel sorry for him either (but of course we feel sad at the situation, though we make the effort not to show it).

So as I started off by saying that Lancashire Lads are made of the ‘reet stuff’ I finish off this blog by saying ‘Here’s cheers to you all’ especially those of my bloke’s generation.
 
Dorothy, so good to hear of your mans indomitable spirit.
I think to a great extent is also a generational thing too.
I think the folk of your generation are built of stern stuff.
Maybe it has something to do with the privations when they were younger....a sort of 'pull your socks up and get on with it' attitude.
None of this 'poor me' victim stuff.
My dear old Ma (god bless her) was made in that mould and stayed cheerful to the very end.

You are right about it being daft to plan for ten years from now, but I think it helps survival to keep your eye on some event on the near horizon....something to look forward to.

Dying is a taboo subject. I know that because when Ma talked about her own demise I mentally put my fingers in my ears and la-la-la-ed until she shut up....and it is so wrong.(I know that now).
So your approach is to be commended.
Always in my thoughts...both of you.
 
Dot you and yer fella are handling this crap,100% right in my eyes, have just been to see my mate this aft, who is in the same position as yer fella, to be honest he aint changed 1 bit, still had a good laugh with him in B.R.I, think there must be summat with Lancashire Lads,;)
 
Get him the box set of "Game of thrones" books to read Dotti, George RR Martin has been dragging his arse about producing the last book, for the past 3 years or so, so on that time table your Bloke should deinitely be getting a good few years yet.

Kindest regards, Dave (D.i.G)
 
Thank you shillelagh. He is doing okay under the circumstances. Enjoys each day as much as he can. He still retains his sense of humour and stays positive about everything. Never says 'why me?'. Makes me very proud.
 
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